My husband is a very manipulative guy who constantly threatens me
We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.
Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
Hi, i am a 25 yr old girl. I have been married for 3 years . My husband is a very manipulative guy who constantly threatens me. Everytime we get into a fight, he says hes going to call my parents and tell them everything. I do not want my parents to get involved as it only makes things worse. I have had a talk with him about this and he agreed not to get my parents involved but everytime we disagree about something , he threatens to call my parents. I feel hurt and mistreated, scared of his threats, so much so that everytime he threatens me , i threaten to throw his work stuff out the window. we had a major fight yesterday and when i scratched him ,(due to his threats) he walked out of the house and said he was going to show the scratches to my parents, i ran barefoot out of the house and was crying, but he couldnt care less how hurt i was. I dont know what to do anymore, i dont know whether i should carry on this relationship. he hurt me so much , i dont know how to behave with him anymore. He is honestly a very dumb guy, who does not know how to deal with everyday situations.He is a mummys boy who only listens to his mum when it comes to makeing decisions, even minor decisions.I dont play a part in his life , other than looking pretty and being a 'party accesory' i hate the way my life has turned out. i cry alot and fear i might be suffering from depression. everytime he sees me cry, he feels nothing. how should i behave with him? should i hide everytime i cry. pls help soon
User Submitted Advice from a 31-40 year old Female
People do not change
Leave him. I know you don't want to here this, but I've been in a manipulative marriage for 14 years. When I first met my husband I was 20 and very young and naive for a 20 year old. I went to a convent til i was 18.
I never even saw the signs for years and years. He was so manipulative I always ending up feeling guilty for ever making a fuss. He always wants everything his way. It doesn't matter what it is. We now have 2 children together and if it weren't for them I would leave. i still love him, but you eventually end up doing everything just to please this person who lies and twists things. We almost were divorced I was fed up, but he said he would change. He hasn't. As soon as things settled down he went back to the way he always has been. He can't change. He doesn't know how. It's the way he is. Either i stay and make the best of it (I don't beleive anything he says) or I leave.
Good luck to you! People do not change.
The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer
Bookmark this site so you can reference it any time you need romantic / relationship info in the future!