I have a crush on a female coworker - but I'm female too
We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.
Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
There is this girl I work with who I happen to like more and more each day. It must be her looks or maybe the personality. Either way, it's messing with my head, it's something I can't control, it just happened. The thing is, I am a girl too.
I am never 'out' at work and I feel frustrated with the situation because I feel as if I can't do anything about it. Out of the blue, I gave her a present and told her I just wanna give her something and it doesn't have to mean a thing. She accepted it and thanked me and actually used it. At work, we both act as if nothing occured, although now she knows I do like her.
Whenever we talk, it's usually work related. I haven't talked to her about how I feel yet, fear of rejection I suppose. At the moment, I am in a limbo as to what to do next. This girl is straight as far as I know. And she has been a major distraction for me as far as my work is concerned. What should I do?
User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
Look for another crush
I'm sorry RomanceClass.com, how can you advise this younge lady to continue to be a better friend and hope that the girl may have an open mind about things. If there's no attraction for what ever reason (gay, straight, race, religion, etc), convincing the person that you are the better choice almost never works. If the girl is straight there is no "get her used to you being around" tactics. You will only set yourself up for failure because you are trying your best to convince a pony to become a cat. As for the visitor, I'm sorry to be so blunt about things but I speak from experience. Continue your friendship with woman and if she is ever ready to explore, she'll be confident that she can turn to you for advise and perhaps the first experience. It's best to look for another crush...
The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer