I'm Jealous about my Boyfriend
We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.
Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
I can't shake the feeling my boyfriend is cheating or will cheat on me. He's a huge flirt and is always looking at other girls.
Guys have always hurt me in the past by cheating. I don't know what to do. He's done things that I can't get out of my mind. I don't want to be jealous,and I want to trust him.
How do I let go of being jealous knowing he's done things with other girls before? How can I not get angry when he's always looking at other girls?
User Submitted Advice from a 13-20 year old Female
The situation i'm in now is quite similiar to yours. Every man is a bastard and in fact, all of them are pervertic when they reach a certain age. My boyfriend likes to look at beautiful and sexy woman on the street. But somehow, i know that he a faithful guy but it's just that every man is pervertic. I'll get extremely jealous when he does that and it can really spoil my whole day's mood. I can go to the extent that i'll also get jealous and angry when he look at pretty singers and actresses on TV, and also when he talked about stuffs that involve any woman. I argued with him many times but it just won't work. Instead, he'll get frustrated over my 'madness'.I felt depressed and i really cannot overcome these extreme jealousy. i even dreamt of me killing his ex-girlfriend! Sounds scary yeh. I knew that all these cannot go on, it will definitely bring unhappiness to the relationship.
I tried seaching the internet on issue on how to overcome jealousy.Exercise can help too.
Just lie down on somewhere you think is comfortable. Imagine you're in your favorite place. Take a deep breath and think of all the happy moments you had and enjoy the peace. Then breathe out, think of what your boyfriend did to you which make you jealous and you really hate that. eg.looking at other girls. Just relax and stay calm. Try to think from the things that you'll least jealous to the one that makes you feel most jealous and unhappy. Slowly overcome all these and when you feel that you'll ready and calm enough, then continue with what you'll doing before that. Good luck to you!!
The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer