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I don't want to keep pushing it



We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
okay, so i've become really close with this guy.. but he's not my boyfriend, he's my friend with "benefits." i've done a lot of things with him that i have never done before, not sex.. but things like oral. i don't mind, i enjoy it but then i wonder if i should do things like this if he's not my boyfriend.. so i confronted him about it, and asked if he wanted to become exclusive boyfriend girlfriend.. but he says that he's not ready for a girlfriend right now. i care about him so much, and i know he cares a lot about me too. it's just so difficult to feel that way about someone and not be something more to them. i don't want to stop what we are doing, but is there a way that i will be able to tell when he's ready to move on? i don't want to keep pushing it. becdause it might push him away.. i just cant stand the thought of never being together. is there anything i can do that might change his mind? thanks so much for you help!




User Submitted Advice from a 13-20 year old Female
Wait a while


hey i think u do have a point there. Well my advice for you is to just wait for him for awhile. And if he dosent come around then tell him how u feel about it again. If he really cared about you he would ungerstand. But if he says no and says that he isent ready for a grilfriend yet well to me if that happening to me it would feel like he is useing me. But you never know maybe hes not useing you. But anyways if he says know then just try to find someone else. Im not saying you have to but just give it a try you might find somebody better that will really love you and want more than just sex. Well i hope this works out for you.

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