I hate boys and their lack of obvious emotions!
We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.
Original Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I've submitted an e-mail before, about whether or not a boy likes me. I suspect that he does, but I feel really insecure about it still.
We went to a dance about a week ago and we danced and everything seemed fine, but my friends told me he looked really uninterested in me. I thought we were doing ok because his hands were on my hips and he would dance and we were holding hands a lot of the time and he would make jokes. For instance, my dress would kinda ride up I would pull it down and he would help me pull it down and then he'd joke about pulling it up. I though we were doing fine... And well it's been a week and I haven't seen him. we don't have any classes together (except for homeroom which only happens once a week) so I never see him during the week and I really want to talk to him. I mean I know we don't have classes together, but is it a bad sign that he never goes looking for me, he never comes by my classes, he never calls me. The only time we talk is when I call. And even though we have homeroom together he doesn't come up to me. I mean if he likes me why doesn't he come up to me. My friends keep telling me I should call him and ask him what we are, but I don't want to come off like this clingy girl who loves drama and I don't understand why I have to do everything. I wouldn't have a problem with doing everything if I knew for a fact that he likes me, but in this case I don't. I have an inkling that he does, but he never takes the initiative to show me that he likes me. The only time he makes a move is after I've made a move...and I don't know if the only reason he makes the move is because he's to nice to shut me down once I've made the first move. Is there a chance that he likes me but doesn't know how to show and that he's wondering if I like him. I mean I think I've made it obvious that I like him (I asked him to the dance, I'm always the one who calls, and I ask him out to do stuff). This is our last week before break and he's going to be gone for a whole month and he's sick this week. I want to hang out with him, but he doesn't think he should because he's sick. I mean he is sick he's been missing school because of it so I don't know if I should feel like this is an excuse or not because it seems reasonable, but I really want to see him before he's gone for a month. Is it bad that I don't sense he's desperate to see me this friday knowing I wont see him over break?
This i probably one of the most girliest, insecure e-mails that you guys have ever gotten so I'm sorry, but gah I hate boys and their lack of obvious emotions!
Thank you so much for any kind of help/advice that you can offer. Let me know if I'm just beyond help!
P.S. Within the past month or two we've been on two dates one of which he dared me to make out with him (which we did for about an hour) and the second one I started nuzzling him and kissing his cheek and we started to make out for about 30min. On our last date (the dance) we didn't kiss or hug afterwards he just said that he had to go and he was gone. Some possible useful information!
User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
Don't do all the work
I think she should just be friends with him. Girls shouldn''t be the ones doing all the work, and she's right, if he really liked her, wouldn't he call her or come over to see her. It also sounds like he could be using her because he knows that she likes him, like how he'll make out with her but later on just leave. I think she should move on and just be friends with him. cause this game of doing all the work isn't doing her any good. and she shouldn't have to do all the work. I'm sure there's some other guys out there who will appreciate her more than this guy does.
The Original Question and RomanceClass Answer