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I'm not flirting

We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Male
My girlfriend and I are having a problem. I am a loyal, faithful and loving partner to her and try my best to show my love for her every day. We spend most of our time together and I love it. However, she constantly thinks I am looking at and openly flirting with every woman that crosses my path. This includes women she knows I would never be attracted too. She thinks I'm an attention seeker in this way and has for most of our relationship. She seems to analyze every aspect of my body language when we are out and she interprets it as flirting with women around us. As far as I know, I'm not a flirt. I'm naturally a very shy person, so I don't normally approach women and I rarely make any eye contact with them, yet she thinks the opposite. I'm trying to read up on body language and such to try to figure out what she's talking about in hopes that I can fix whatever behavior she is noticing. She says she would cheat on me if I don't fix my behavior. I love her so much and I don't want her stray because she perceives something that doesn't match my feelings. Is there a way to make her see that I'm not flirting, or if I am unintentionally doing it, is there a way for me to cure it?

User Submitted Advice from a 13-20 year old Female
Jealosy lists

Perhaps, you should sit down and ask her to make a list of everything she sees as flirting. You should do the same, and then compare the lists to find out what your different perceptions are. Then later, make an agreement on the understanding of why you think certain things are flirting and why you think others are not.

Y. M.

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