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I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half, and I have a strong issue about one of his friends which is a female

We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
This is the first time i have ever done something like this and hoping that being said hearing someone elses veiw will help.
I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half, and I have a strong issue about one of his friends which is a female, but that is not the reason.
This "friend" is a prostitute, has a big gambling problem, and is a god awful mother.
They have been friends for about 3 years, and what I have heard is unbelievable!
This women only calls for his money, and when she doesn't get it she throws a tantrum and says that the friendship is done...blah...blah...blah...And then he gives her money.

I have listened to a conversation between the two which, he let me listen- and she preceded to tell him that is was his fault that her marriage was falling apart. He told her husband that she spent the savings, and has been "TAKING" money from him for a long time.

He continues to forgive her and gets mad at me when they talk. I just don't understand the reason....
She has caused a lot of problems within our relationship, and I feel as though he is choosing her over me.
He is such a good person and has such a huge heart, that he has a hard time saying no....especially when it comes to her kids...

I believe that he is my soul mate- which needs to work which I am so willing to do, but is it worth it to argue about this all the time????


User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
Needs, needs, needs

This is a very hard decision you need to make. I probably would not be able to handle something like this. One thing you need to ask yourself, is do you really trust him, and has he ever given you any reason not to trust him. If the answer is no, and you really do love him then you may just have to step aside and let him do his thing. This women sounds really messed up and if there are kids involved then maybe he really does just want to look out for the safety of them. I know its not his responsibilty but if they were friends before you two started dating then maybe you shouldn't have continued to date him. But like i said if this was me in the situation i would have left him along time ago if he couldn't respect my feelings on it or at least agree on a way to make us both happy about the situation. I hope this helps you a little bit, and helps him decide whats more imporatant(the one he loves, or the one that just needs, needs, needs)

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