needless to say he was frustrated and disappointed cause I lost the mood



We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
Well I'm back but in a different category, you guys seem to really help hopefully you can this time as well. It has been would say about a month since the guy i'm dating and i have had sex. I was a virgin and he was my first and we've only had sex twice, yes sad I know how many actual times. Time didn't permit a lot of occassions for us to be sexual we both were having a lot to deal with and now things look as if they are going good again, well so I thought. This past weekend we spent the entire weekend together which is something we hadn't done for months (we have been together going on 6 months)well knowing that we hadn't spent much time together we planned that after our softball game on friday we'd go out together and i'd stay the night at his place or he'd stay the night at mine. Well after the game we called a few of the team mates to see what they were doing and we decided to just go to this bar by his house have a few drinks and come home. Well we were in his room laying on the bed and we started fooling around and I thought ok now we are talking, I asked if he had protection and he told me no. Well I got kind of upset but didn't really show it verbally, my body started to tense up as the thoughts of why he didn't have protection started to surface and needless to say he was frustrated and disappointed cause I lost the mood, didn't want anything to do with him or his little man. We decided to just go to sleep he kissed me goodnight as I had my back towards him, I felt bad but then again i felt like if he knew I was staying why wasn't he prepared. In the morning I woke up to feel his embrace and for like an hour I watched the ceiling wondering am I the only one he has in his bed, if not is that why the last time we had sex i knew he was running low on condoms but he still had some. When I'm with him, my heart controls everything and i though i didn't want to have feelings for him I did and that was after we were sexual the first time, but am I just a casual sex thing for him, is our intimacy more imporant. Such as when we are sleeping his arms are around me, taking in each other's breaths is that more important than sex? He wanted to do it from behind but because i was upset that he was not prepared I tensed up and just spoiled a good night, what should I do? What should I say? I'm lost i'm new to this and honestly I want to make him happy, eliminate the competition if there is any and release this sexual drive in me.




User Submitted Advice from a 21-30 year old Female
Have protected sex


Get rid of him. If he really liked you, he should be prepared. Especially if he knows you won't have sex without protection. My first time was with a guy i ended up dating for almost 2 years. We had sex every night we were together for months. If you want it, it should be the same for you. I say find someone else. Of course, you probably should be talking about this with him. He knows best why he didn't have protection, and he should NOT be upset at you for not wanting to have unprotected sex. It's your right.

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