Is my Partner Cheating?

This is a very common fear. Most people have worried about this at least once in a relationship. And the vast majority of the time, it comes down to the worrier's insecurities. If she sees her boyfriend talking to his secretary, she figures "of course" he's after the secretary because the secretary is prettier than she is. If he sees his girlfriend flirting with another guy, he figures "of course" his girlfriend will run off with the guy, because the guy is more athletic. Most of the time, the partner has no intention at all of leaving!

But the more you second guess and doubt your partner, the more harm you cause to the relationship. Relationships are about trust, honesty, communication. If one person is always worried about the other person leaving, and jealous of anybody the other person talks to, it chips away at the relationship. And it may be a self fulfilling fear, because the partner may finally get sick of being doubted all the time and leave.

So take a step back. It's normal for people to have male AND female friends. If the sight of your partner with a member of the opposite sex upsets you, read through the many tips on jealousy and self esteem. You should be secure enough in your love for each other that you don't worry about him abandoning you any time someone else comes along.

With all of that said, there are a few people out there who DO cheat. If you have proof, or a very reasonable case, then confront your partner, talk about it, and deal with it. If all you have is vague fears, then work on your fears, and keep communication lines very open.





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