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Posted By: seek break up - and confuse - 02/21/10 02:52 PM
hi thr. i jz broke up with my gf. but she keep sms asking i still wan her or not like million of times. i keep telling her . i still want her. after a while, i tell her if her heart is with other guy , jz tel me i will accept it but after that she didn't tel me whether she still wan the relation. i also dunno whether we r friend or what. when i when to her hm to discuss our matters. she keep touching my face n tease me. but when i accidentally hold her hand. she like jz swing it away. but at her hm. i saw she like keep caution with her handphone like waiting sms frm other ppl. so i hope, any1 of u. can help me with dis problem.
Posted By: PDM Re: break up - and confuse - 02/21/10 05:05 PM
Hello Seek & welcome smile

As a first word of advice, may I say that I think that it would be much easier for us to read your posts ~ and, therefore, for people to reply, if they didn't contain 'text speak'. Thanks. smile

So you broke up with your girlfriend, but she keeps asking you if you still want her. And it seems that you do???

But you want to know if she likes someone else ~ and, if she does, you will accept that.

Now you don't know how things stand.

She flirts with you when you see her ~ touching your face ~ but is wary of you even touching her hand.

You thought that, when you visited her home to discuss the situation, even though she was talking to you at the time, she seemed to be waiting for a call or message from someone else.

*

Well, even though you still care for her, it was you who ended the relationship, so you must have felt that you had good reason to do this.

Either you did have a good reason, or you didn't.
Either she is more interested in another boy, ot she isn't.

If she really wants someone else, and is just leading you on with meaningless flirtation, then it is best for you to let her move on and to move on, yourself.

If she actually wants you, and you dropped her for no good reason, then it is not surprising that she is now wary of you.

So there are a few questions to be asked:

Does she want to be with you?
Is she interested in another boy?
Does she just want to flirt with you, while she is waiting for the boy she really likes?

Were you right to drop her?
Did you have a good reason?
Do you still care for her?

If you were incorrect in your assumptions, when you broke up, could you get her trust back?
Do you want to / do you still like her / do you want her back?

If you both care, and there is no-one else involved, then you will need to sort yourselves out and regain each other's trust.

If there is another boy involved, then you will need to know if it is you she wants, or him, and decide where you are going to go from there.

If she wants him, then you have said that you are willing to move on.

What if she wants you?

I think that, maybe, you either need to have another serious chat with her, or else forget the whole thing & move on. smile

What do you think?
Posted By: Alice Re: break up - and confuse - 02/21/10 05:38 PM
I think her reaction is very normal.She just tries to show you that there`s a world for her without you and she became that happy person she was before the break-up.Avoiding your touch is a self-defense action.Your hurt her when you broke up and she does not want to go through that again.

My question is why on earth don`t you speak up and tell her you`re still having feelings for her?She obviously shares them,due to the fact that you`re still talking and meeting.
You were the one that ended this,so don`t expect her to come and say she loves you,even if that`s true.She probably did that after the break-up and obviously,didn`t work out.

I am going through a similar situation,except the meeting part,and although I love him so much,I`ve decided not to tell him again my feelings ,just for the fact I am afraid of his reaction,a rejection I would not cope with.

Good luck! smile
Posted By: PDM Re: break up - and confuse - 02/21/10 06:23 PM
Hi Alice ~ I think that you could be right, here ~ and I am sorry to hear that you are going through a painful time smile
Posted By: Alice Re: break up - and confuse - 02/21/10 07:25 PM
I appreciate that.Well,things are the same as in my last reply in my topic and I think they`ll be the same for a while on
Posted By: seek Re: break up - and confuse - 02/21/10 11:12 PM
that's the problem. when i ask her,r u waiting love from other boy. she jz ignore my question. nw i dont know whether she is waiting other boy or waiting me to solve this out. a minute ago, she said we jz b friends. then when i decide it and wanted to make it clear to tell her parents. she suddenly chg her mind and said no such thing. we end up, becoz of my jealousy against her receiving other guys text and call.
Posted By: seek Re: break up - and confuse - 02/21/10 11:19 PM
and sometimes, she text me ,Example, xoxo (hug and kisses)...i also duno what to reply and as a friend or what. ^.^
Posted By: Alice Re: break up - and confuse - 02/21/10 11:35 PM
if you`re still having feelings for her,tell her you 2 should talk,and say everything to her: you love her and want to make things better.
If you want to move on,just accept the friendship offer and act cool.
Posted By: seek Re: break up - and confuse - 02/26/10 01:32 AM
after reunite with my ex..the first nite...everythg going fine and smooth...including we did make up ...after few days..we try ti make up and...she jz trying to ignore and give me many types of excuses ...the worst part is that , she keep on texting and nvr let me know who and what ...i keep on asking...so secret ...damn...regret with the reunite ...
Posted By: PDM Re: break up - and confuse - 02/26/10 02:04 AM
Maybe you should stop texting, or receiving texts. It is too impersonal and too easy to say just about anything.

Tell her that if this is a serious relationship, then you need to talk, properly, and sort it out.

If she is willing to do that, then maybe there is a chance; if not, then perhaps she is ready to move on, and you will know that it is time for you to move on as well.

How old are both of you, by the way? It can make a difference.
Posted By: breakupadvice Re: break up - and confuse - 03/13/10 04:56 PM
you should not be a part of the text terrorism..i mean dont fill up her phone with text from you every minute..just cool off for a while to know what her reaction will be so that you can use that to your advantage..
Posted By: Chikiwau Re: break up - and confuse - 05/23/10 12:53 AM
Hello!
i also think that you should talk to her. You should take the initiative and find a solution to this. You two should talk to come up with a solution together! If this does not turn out to be the way you wanted, Dont feel bad! Its ok and it hurts but think of it this way: There is someone looking for you in this world! sometimes, things are not meant to be!! Smile!! But yea, my advice would be to talk to her and tell her that she should put her feeling in order.
Good luck!
=D
Posted By: PDM Re: break up - and confuse - 05/23/10 02:03 AM
Welcome to the forum Breakupadvice and Chikiwau smile smile
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