ok...well my boyfriend and me were together for 2 yrs and 3 months...the problem started when i wanted to go to a party and he didn't want to (he wanted to go to a different party)...well we ended up going to the party i wanted to go to and after he dropped me off and got home, he changed and went to the party he originally wanted to go to. He met a girl there and the girl got his number from his cousin during the week. well he didn't tell me about this (i had to find out by some friends) i confronted him and he told me that he knew i would find out about it sooner or later. he wanted to break up and blamed me for the break up. he told me he was tired of the arguing and couldn't take my jealousy anymore!!

this is the guy that i wanted to marry one day and even though he did this i was still willing to forgive him. i pleaded and begged and did everything but he didn't want to come back to me. I don't know what to do but i feel like my life was torn away from me!!! i really wanted our relationship to lead us to marriage!!! i miss him more as each day goes by and it makes me even more jealous to think that im over here crying for him while he is talkin to this girl...he lives here in south carolina and she lives in charlotte!! he is 19 and she is 21!!! Im 18 going on 19...EVERYBODY tells me that it won't work out for them and that he'll be back begging for me to take him back but how he's acting i really don't think he will do that.

yes we've had our fights here and there but nothing this big!! just to add in...when the other girl started texting him he asked me for a "break" but i didn't want to give it to him (i still didn't no that he had gone out) because i was afraid to loose him! now look at what happened!!!!!! how can i get him back?!?!?!?!?!?

This guy does not seem serious. At that age people are not thinking about marriage. What I have learned from other people is if someone breaks up with you, it doesn't work out between them and the other person and they come crawling back begging do not give in! You do not want to be the reserve girl who he could leave again and come back.

Hi confused,

I think that you should let him go ahead with this other girl. I know this hurts, but believe me, it will pass. And you deserve a guy who sees you as the prize you are. Your soulmate--the man who you are truly meant to marry--wouldn't talk to another girl at a party and then not tell you about it.

Trust me, this guy is not worth your time. You're going to move through the pain--it is completely temporary, trust me--but if you 'get him back' he'll just do this to you in one way or another over and over again.

Instead of spending all of your energy worrying about how you can get this guy back, work on realizing that you're worth a guy who treats you well and who doesn't hurt you. When this one comes crawling back to you--which he will, once he sees how evolved and self confident you have become--believe me, you won't even want him anymore. He's done you a favor.

Good luck!

For a marriage to work, both parties have to be in love with, and totally devoted to, the other.
It does not sound as if this is happening here.
And, to be honest, although it can happen, it rarely does with people who are so young.

People grow and change and grow apart ~ and they need the freedom to do so.

You would be better off enjoying your youth ~ meeting different people, etc, before committing yourself to one person for the rest of your life.

It really sounds as if this boy is not ready for the kind of commitment that you have in mind.

This will be hard for you & it will hurt, but I feel that it will be for the best in the long term.

Good luck