Really Sad - RomanceClass Forum

Originally Posted By: Reallysad

Well, I just got dumped by a very good friend and more. I had not seen someone in over 15 years and he said let me in, trust me, and I won't hurt you. He still was seeing someone and I said I needed more. He dumped me. I have know this person for a long time. Now for the last several days, all I do is cry. It hurt so much. He won't talk to me or email me because my email came out confrontational.

Originally Posted By: london blue rose

move on theres to much junk in the trunk.

Originally Posted By: Reallysad

I can do that.. Does that mean it really is his problem, I think so

Originally Posted By: birdygirly016

I think maybe your girlfriend is confused.She moved on to another guy to maybe try and forget how she feels about you, but still wants you in her life because she still cares for you. When you went out with another girl she got upset maybe because she thought you would be more 'loyal' even after she hadn't exactly been the same to you. Girls can set unfair expectations, and set you up to fail without realizing it. I have done that before, in a way. Breaking up with a guy and saying I want you to date other people, but all the while had a HUGE knot in my stomach saying it, but didn't expect anything to happen, and when it did it is like a shocker in a way. I'm not saying it's right to do this, because it is mean to do it and it hurts you and whoever you are doing it to.

In a way, I think that maybe it is too hard for you to be just friends with her. I know what it is like to try and stay friends with a very close ex. You are always grasping at straws praying that maybe if you are nice and friendly you will remind her why she should want to be with you. It's hard, because usually that person gets comfortable as 'just friends' and you just have to accept things. I think maybe you should take time to get over your feelings for her if you want to be friends...it's just not fair to you if you hang in there and play her games. Maybe during the time you take away from her, she may realize what she lost, and may try to come back in your life. Maybe not. But you need time to move on and not torture yourself.

Originally Posted By: Really Sad

I had not seen someone in over 15 years and he said let me in, trust me, and I won't hurt you. He still was seeing someone and I said I needed more. He dumped me. I have know this person for a long time. Now for the last several days, all I do is cry. It hurt so much. He won't talk to me or email me because my email came out confrontational.

If you had not been in a relationship for many years, and you finally trusted someone, then this sort of behaviour is likely to hit you hard.

Maybe he really believed that he wouldn't hurt you, but he did.
Perhaps , once he had started seeing you, he concluded that you were not right for each other after all.

Or maybe he just set himself the challenge of getting you to let him into your life, and, once the challenge was over, the relationship was over.

The fact that he was seeing someone else rather indicates that he wasn't too worried about hurting either you or his girlfriend ~ perhaps you were wrong to trust him, but maybe you trusted him because you knew him and he swept you off your feet ~ and, after so long, you were ready to be swept along.

I am sorry that this has happened, but it has been a learning experience for you ~ a negative one, unfortunately.

It's bound to hurt, and he has treated you badly and continues to treat you badly by ignoring your messages.

Personally, I think that you should not bother further with him. He has shown his true colours.

But you can take something positive from this ~ you have started dating again and so you can now find a decent man to spend time with.

Obviously, you may not want to 'seek a boyfriend', but you can seek out opportunities for meeting new people ~ a club, hobby, evening class, or something, where you can meet up with others who have similar interests. Just be careful to keep yourself safe.

Give yourself time to cry over this, but then start again. Don't let him ruin future relationships just because he treated you badly. He's not worth it.

Take care

Thank you for taking the time to write to me. This forum and blogs are still unfamiliar areas. It means alot that you took the time. Happy holidays. and it was a needed advise.

Thanks.

Hi again

I hope that we have been able to help.

Happy Holidays to you too ~ and do come back, whenever you wish ~ we have many areas for discussion which you may enjoy.

Take care & good luck!