I have been with my boyfriend for 9 years. And over the past 6 months, I have been starting to realize that I don't want to be with him anymore. I own my home and he lives with me. I love him, but I haven't been in love with him for sometime. I don't know how to to tell him he has to go. I also don't know how to let him go. I am scared that if he is the one for me, I'm blowing my chance. He loves me more than anything,and I know this is hurt him badly but I am starting to resent him and I don't even know why. Please help me figure out how I am to tell him.

maybe you just want to experience new things. it could be just that your looking for a change and you want to find someone new. 9 years is a very long time to be in a boyfriend girlfriend relationship. maybe you should give it more thought and think about why you have diffrent feelings towards him. maybe talk it over with a few people and in the end if you feel like you need to break up maybe its best that you do.

PS- if he was the one for you i dont think you would be doubting your relationship with him

and if you do break up with him dont use any of those everyday break up lines. make it come from you not a movie or a tv show.

Hi golfergirl and welcome.
I'll go through this:

After nine years, you have come to this conclusion in 6 months?
Has something happened in these last few months?

Were you very young when you got together ~ have you changed a lot over the years?


When I got married I was told that after the first few years love changes.
You still love each other, but it isn't usually the kind of exciting affair that it was at first.

How long have you actually been living together?
Perhaps this is what they call 'the seven year itch'.
It might happen whoever you were with.


Are you sure of your feelings?
You don't love him enough? In the right way? What, exactly?
If you don't love him, why would you think that he was the one for you?!

I think that this is going to be very hard for both of you.
If you don't love him, I suppose he needs to know, especially if you don't want him living with you any more.
But you say you do love him ~ and still think that he may be the one for you.


You are sure that this relationship is over?
Why are you only now starting to resent him?
I recommend that you get counselling, first, just in case it's something that can be sorted out.

Good luck!

i think that maybe, over the past 9 years, you might be, correct me please if i'm wrong, a little bored with the relationship...

maybe you should tell him that you need a break and that you want to see how things go with other people...

it's going to be soo painful for him AND you, but if you want to see if you're making a mistake, like everything else in this sad world, you have to grin and bear it. (or cry and bear it, whatever floats you're boat.)

do you're best, good luck!