I have been with my Fiance for 6 yrs. now. In the begining he always paid attention and listened. Now he dont pay attention as well nor does he communicate very well without thinking anything I say is an arguement. I have 2 tattoes and recently my ex hubby asked him since when did i get tattoes and even asked where one was and my fiance said he could not remember where my one tattoe is. How can a fiance not remember being I have shown him over and over the tattoe. Its not even just that. It just seems to me he is more interested in his racing things on weekends then me. I go away for 2 weeks and he is on yahoo looking up other womans profiles. Now mind you he messed up once in past by meeting a girl from yahoo and giving her money for her kids and that was it. But he still met her and that is the point. What would you woman do?

I'm only 17, so don't take this advice too heavily since i've never been engaged. However, I think, first of all, you should attempt talking to him. No matter what, talking has to be the first thing you do. If there's still no change in his behavior, try getting him to spend more time with you, maybe do a few things interesting and different. The reason he may not pay much attention to you is that he's gotten so used to your mannerisms and how you are. If you plan something unexpected, or do something different in bed (if you two have sex before marriage), then maybe that will rekindle his feelings for you and make him realize why he's engaged to you in the first place.

Just take things slow. You have all the time in the world to either make things right (which i'm sure you want to), or move on.

Hi and welcome LostInLove38 & Coleslaw

Yes, LostinLove, I think you do need to communicate first and find out what is really going on in his head. Then you can decide, between you, what to do about it.

Re tattoos, maybe he doesn't want to discuss such matters with a 'rival'.

Maybe he's concerned that the 'ex-hubby' is still involved in your lives.

Men & women think & communicate differently. I really believe that most couples could benefit from reading up on the subject. I think the most well-known book is the Venus & Mars one.

i think u bore your fiance--spice things up make your relationship more exciting and adventuroes

Sometimes people are looking for arguments when they are no longer happy with a relationship ~ either as an excuse for negativity or as a reason for blame. Maybe this is happening here.


Sometimes men think that women 'mean' something other than what they are saying. This is where the books on the differences between male & female thinking & communicating can come in handy.