Well...I'm not that old. But so what if I were????...I have a lot of years experience, and trying to explain it to someone who is young I have learned is useless.... but here goes.
If I had unconditional love I would still be putting up with someone abusing me physically and emotionally. I chose NOT to. It is a condition with me. You can't treat me that way and continue to be with me. I might love you, but you will no longer get to be with me. Make sense? It ended, so the love ended with it...after a long while.
With my children there are no conditions. They can be horrible, treat me horribly, I might not want to be around them, but I will always love them. End of story.
Love is sacrafice. I have learned that. And that is ok. What if you abosolutely do not want to convert to hinduism? You might anyway, that is a sacrifice you are willing to make. If it means nothing to you to do this, it's not much of a sacrifice, by the way. If it were important for you to remain catholic, it would be a major sacrifice.
Love is conditional and needs to be so that you always have the self love you need. You aren't any good to yourself or to anyone else if you don't have that.
No one should change your identity, I don't believe in that and you can't change others. You can only change yourself. I think deep down you see that. She should not be putting that condition on you, but there you are.
It's important to her. Go for it if it means more to be with her than staying catholic, which it doesn't sound like it is. So no issue, no sacrifice. Wait 'till something that means something important comes into the picture.
By the way, my love is working. We are different people, but our values are the same, we want the same outcome, which is to grow old together. I have a peaceful acceptance of my mate and him me.
Believe me, it's not a business. It took a lifetime to find each other, but we would probably have been too selfish to have made it work when we were younger. I tell him all the time I wish he were the father of my kids and I know he feels the same.
My life is lived transparently and I make no demands (other than he pick up his socks)
and it's a mutual respect and understanding and trust. It feels long overdue and wonderful