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#406203 - 11/17/10 09:33 PM what's happening?  
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 25
lamf10 Offline
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lamf10  Offline
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 25
Arizona
i was dating a girl and we have been going out for almost a year. we broke up about 2 months ago. since we broke up i havent talked to her but just yesterday she texed my younger sister looking for me. my sister gave me the phone and said she was getting tired of telling her she didnt know where i was. i got the phone and she was askin me what ive been up to and i told her nothing just the usual. she was alright after a while. but then she was talking about how happy she was when she was with me and all the good times we had. (while she was txting me she was drinking) i told her that she didn't really didn't want to talk to me and that she was just drinking. she told me no and that she wanted to get back with me and that she missed having me around. i told her that maybe we could be friends and just try to keep it at that so that neither of us would get hurt. she said alright but she still was trying to get to me and wanting me to let her come see me. i told her that i would kick back with her later this weekend.
the reason that we broke up was because she kissed someone else and that got me mad but she said it wasnt suppost to happen. that they were just friends. after that we just kept arguing about it and that was when we ended it. but now here she comes wanting to get back in the picture. some of our friends told me that since we broke up that she hasnt been the same that she been like shes depressed. some of them were getting mad and saying look what you did you broke her. i do feel bad cause i still love her but i dont know if thats enough anymore or if it will be the same.


mr&msangelbaby
#406215 - 11/19/10 01:00 AM Re: what's happening? [Re: lamf10]  
Joined: Dec 2004
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PDM Offline
PDM  Offline


True Blue Soulmate

Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 22,697
UK
Hi lamf10 smile

She says that she wants to be with you, and you still love her.
If both of you feel like this, then maybe it's worth giving the relationship another chance. what do you think?

But, if you do, you will need to put concerns about the kiss behind you.

If you are worried that she will go off with other boys, then you are not going to be happy, so maybe you need to really talk this out. She may be concerned about doing this, but, if you explain that you need to put it in the past and get closure, so that you can move on, then she may feel that it is a good idea.

The truth is that some girls & boys kiss others because they are looking for fun elsewhere and they may continue to stray ~ but there are also girls & boys, who will just find themselves kissing someone, without ever intending it to happen and without ever intending for it to happen again.

People are human, with human failings. No-one is perfect.

Have a think about what you want and what you can do about it.

Good luck smile



"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
#406430 - 11/30/10 10:54 PM Re: what's happening? [Re: PDM]  
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lamf10 Offline
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lamf10  Offline
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 25
Arizona
(she is the same girl from my previous situations- just so you know-that this is a same sex relationship)

i have put that kiss behind me, i want to move on from that. she and i have been really good friends for a long time, we can open up to each other about anything. i realize what your saying and i appreciate your opinion smile since then she keeps askin if i want to get back together i decided to give it another try. she is having problems at home with her family so she is going to stay with me. when i told my family that she was going to stay with me they all just looked at me like "please tell us our kidding" i said that i was serious. they all looked at me and said that they wanted nothing to do with me as long as i was with her. and that i wasn't to come around until she was gone. all of a sudden they all turned on me frown i don't know what to do i love my family and i love her too.


mr&msangelbaby
#406438 - 12/01/10 03:44 AM Re: what's happening? [Re: lamf10]  
Joined: Dec 2004
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PDM Offline
PDM  Offline


True Blue Soulmate

Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 22,697
UK
Hello again lamf10 smile

Why is your family against her?
If we know that, then we may be able to advise you better.

Is it related to these comments you made before?
Originally Posted By: lamf10
she [mother] told me not to go back unless i was done with my girlfriend. and i quit being bi.


You said there that:
Originally Posted By: lamf10
my other family is alrite with it except her. i don't know how to get her to except me for who i am, i can't change who i am.


So has the rest of the family changed?

Is it being bi-sexual that bothers them, or do they just not like this girl?

Is it to do with your break-up?

Last edited by PDM; 12/01/10 03:45 AM.

"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
#409945 - 02/09/11 11:12 PM Re: what's happening? [Re: lamf10]  
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 25
lamf10 Offline
Member
lamf10  Offline
Member

Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 25
Arizona
Sorry i haven't wrote back in awhile.
Update: I took your advice I gave the relationship another try. I'm glad I did. Things couldn't be better. I'm really happy. My family changed their mind about her and welcomed her to the family. So my relationship with my family and my girl are goin really good. I'm working really hard to make sure things stay that way. smile thanks for the advice.


mr&msangelbaby
#409981 - 02/11/11 01:05 AM Re: what's happening? [Re: lamf10]  
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 22,697
PDM Offline
PDM  Offline


True Blue Soulmate

Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 22,697
UK
Hi smile
It's great to hear that things are going well smile
Super!


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
#415359 - 05/18/11 12:39 AM Re: what's happening? [Re: lamf10]  
Joined: Nov 2009
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lamf10 Offline
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lamf10  Offline
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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 25
Arizona
the last time i responded was back in feb. and that was a while back about me tryin the same relationship again i also responded that i was happy n glad i did...that is still the feeling i have to this day me and the girl im with are very happy and recently had a bit of a family adventure me her and my son went to sea world he just got promoted to kindergaden and i just graduated from high school...my family is so happy for us...well almost everybody my little sister is sort of jealous of my girlfriend cause i spend time with her and she thinks i dont have time for her anymre but that is not true im trying to get her to see that im in a relationship but i still love her and that i will always time for her but its not really working....any suggestions.....


mr&msangelbaby
#415360 - 05/18/11 01:17 AM Re: what's happening? [Re: lamf10]  
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 22,697
PDM Offline
PDM  Offline


True Blue Soulmate

Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 22,697
UK
Hi lamf10

Yes, it's difficult when someone wants you all to themselves and have to share you smile

Did your sister go to 'Sea World' with you?

Would it be possible for you to spend some special quality time with her ~ so that she knows that she is still special to you, even though you now have a significant other??


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
#419998 - 11/09/11 03:22 PM Re: what's happening? [Re: lamf10]  
Joined: Nov 2011
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bdalton Offline
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bdalton  Offline
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Posts: 5
It really is hard to gauge when you have not set a label for you to work with because once you lose everything, you can't hang onto something that you have agreed to be. This always happens to those who are not ready to commit so that once they feel that things are not as they used to be, they have the easiest ticket out of the relationship. While it is nothing more than a label, you really have to establish what you are as a couple.


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