RomanceClass.com Forums Romance Does He/She Like Me? Heart on the line and so confused

Satine - I sence there is something else going on here. Why would his parents disown him if he chose to have a different girlfriend than he has now. Are there some religious/ethnic factors that have not been expressed?

It does not sound like you have the whole truth. It also sounds like you are a fling. I don't mean to be harsh but if you both really have that strong of feelings about each other there should be a mutual desire to be together (for real).

I know how strong the electricity of an exciting relationship can be - but are you willing to "settle" for just that part of his life. It sounds like you are willing to give him your full life, but is he willing to give you his full life?

i think the problem here is that his girlfriend is very close with his family and he thinks that by breaking up with her his parents will be upset and angry because i guess she would be like a daughter to them in a sense, or that is the way he sees it. they have only been together for a little over a year.We are both in our early 20's, both performers, so we are highly emoitional and sensetive beings. He is very caught up in what people think of him, and is highly insecure about our situation. There is deffinatley no religious or ethnic factors in this parent thing.

he says i'm not a fling and that i mean more to him then a piece of xxxx, which is what i accused him of making me when we had a fight a few weeks ago. He says he's "scared". I don't know how to reassure him this can be ok. He told one of his friends that this whole situation has been bothering him immensely, he hasn't been able to sleep etc that its "xxxxxxx with is mind". I'm in exactly the same mental state too. what should i say to him when i see him on thursday?

Satine, you have received a number of responses & you seem not to think that we have understood things correctly.

What should you say to him?
Only you can answer that.
But what is going on at present is not fair on her or you.
And you are the one who knows about it.
You are, therefore, a party to the deceit.

The long and the short of it is:
You really like him.
You are ready to commit to him.
He says that he really likes you.
He is not ready to commit to you.

He has a girlfriend.
He has not attempted to end the relationship with her.
He is more concerned about the relationship between his parents and his girlfriend than the one he has with you ~ apparently.

He is not overly young.
His parents have no control over him of an ethnic or religious nature.

How far has this gone?
You don't have to answer on here, but it's something that you need to consider.

Are he and his girlfriend living together 'as man and wife'?
Are you actually indulging in a 'sexual affair'?

How serious the one relationship is, and how far things have gone physically in the other, obviously have a bearing on this.

What do you think that you should say to him?

If it were me, I don't think that I could cope with having a relationship with someone, who wanted me to be his sordid secret.
I don't think that I could cope with having a relationship with someone, who was also having a relationship with someone else.
I wouldn't want to share him with someone else.
I wouldn't want to deceive another girl.
I wouldn't want to worry that I was the one being deceived.

But love and attachment are strange ~ they are like addictions. It is hard to give up the man you want, even if he is with someone else.

What are you going to do?

He is obviously not strong enough to deal with this, or he doesn't want to deal with it.

By the way, I hope that I don't sound harsh.

I know that this must be a very difficult situation for you, Satine, but it just seems so unfair on the women involved. Yet the man in question is getting a lot of sympathy, from you, for two-timing yourself and another girl.

no offense, and this is not to come off as a mean thing, but he sounds like my ex. He could literally turn the water works off and on to show me how "sorry" he was. We dated for almost 3 years...and he was cheating on me almost the whole way. Having been on both sides, I know that there is NO way to be let down easy by the person you love.

I also think that he is playing you. My ex would say "I thought you said this, so I did this blah blah" and I would fall for it ALL the time. The stories sound familiar. Some men are like this..they say and do things that are horrible..and it doesn't matter to them who they hurt in the process.

It is my opinion that if it weren't you it would be somebody else that he is cheating on his current girlfriend with..if there isn't another on the side. I could be way off about him..but the things you say..they just sound soooo familiar..sorry if it comes off as harsh.

I think you could do WAY better than him. If he did get with you, chances are, he would do the same thing to you as he is to her.

sorry again for the bluntness of this. But I know what it is like be blinded by love.

Sorry if I seemed...mean last night.

I just firmly believe that women in these situations can find better men that PROVE they want to be with them by not leading them on for months. having been at the bottom end of the kind of man that treats you worse than xxxx under his shoe, and having found someone who actually cares after has shown me that people don't HAVE to be put through that xxxx for love, because that isn't love at all..I think you could find a man that wants you and only you, regardless of what anyone else thinks.

He will pick you up when you are down, and then not have to run back to his girlfriend because YOU will be his girlfriend.

If this other guy truly cares, you beginning to move on will either snap him into action...or show you that he was never there to begin with. You are not the one that needs to have patience with him. You DESERVE better

GOOD LUCK!!

I feel wary about this, too.

And what about: