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Joined: Apr 2007
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and I know that he likes me too. The thing is that we are both pretty shy. We first saw each other where he works and totally made a connection the minute we looked at eachother! Everytime I go into where he works, we talk a little, he says something like "wow, thats a really cool shirt" and I'll say "thank you" or something else small just to TRY and get us REALLY talking, but we haven't YET to get into a real conversation because we are both just so nervous! This has been going on for about 2 months now, I don't go in there THAT often maybe ever 2 weeks, but it never fails, everytime I'm in there he so obviously nervous but we both still attempt to say SOMETHING to eachother! So, last weekend me and my mom ran into a fast food place to grab something, and low and behold, guess who was in that restaurant at the same exact time?! HIM! My mom said the only way to describe him was that he looked like he was going to "pee in his pants!" We kept shotting glances and little smiles at eachother, but thats it. So, with the suggestion of my mom, I wrote him a letter saying that "...I've never done this before... I don't know if you have a girlfriend but if you don't, here's my myspace and cell phone number so that we can talk out side" [of where he works]. I was to nervous to give it to him myself so I had my mom and little sister go buy something at the store he works at, and then give it to him, from me, as if I were at work and wasn't able to! I wasn't at work, like I said, I was just SO nervous. So, he got the letter a week ago. In your opinion, how long should it take for him to respond? We're both so shy so I don't know WHAT to do! What would you do in order to pursue someone you liked if you were both shy, and he hasn't responded to a letter? Do I give the letter more time or move on to a new strategy? I keep wondering if he was put off by the fact that I myself didn't give him the letter. If thats the case, what could I do to fix it? Also, I'm 21, so I would need some advice on how to handle this situation other than how you would handle it in say, high school! Thanks for your opinion! Its greatly appreciated!

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Maybe we are not supposed to show interest?


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Hello gsusisking & Halo_rainbow.
welcome to the forum.

Well, gsusisking, I just don't know. If you like him & he likes you & you are both shy, but you have been willing to make the first move, why hasn't he responded?

Could it be that he was embarrassed to receive that note from your Mum & your sister?

Maybe he thinks that it isn't really from you, but a joke?

I received a nice little note from a boy once ~ except it wasn't from him - my two friends had concocted it as a little joke!!!

Go in yourself and just say hello ~ since you find it hard to think of something to say, have something semi-prepared in advance ~ and then see what happens.

Good luck!




"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
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Wow I have never heard of someone being so proactive in avoiding interaction with a guy.. Have you held a conversation to create a common interest? or some common ground? if so while you are still in the shy stages can you use them to begin a conversation? or can you talk about something in the shop to get a conversation started. and if you dont want to be so foward to asking him straight up if he has a girlf maybe use some initiative ie: I work in an automotive industry so women come in and will buy something and if I am interested to find if they have a partner I will ask "if your boyfriend is going to fit this part they might need"...or "is your boyfriend/partner fitting this? because we can fit it if you like " etc etc people will almost always correct an incorrect statement about their relationship status, especially women. (in my experience)

I dont think getting your mum to pass letters is the right way tho, because it would make it a bit odd to know how to reply.. if he is as shy as you say he might be finding hard to know what to say?

Guys love the compliement of a girl being keen on them, so even if he does have a girlfriend nothing ventured nothing gained?

goodluck


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