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#168254 04/10/07 03:08 PM
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 1
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New Member
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 1
I have been involved with my girlfriend for six years and I think that we may have reached the point of no return?

My story goes like this. I met my sweet heart back on April 6th 2001, I feel in love with her when I first met her and we been together every since.

For the first two years it seen to me that I was living in paradise. Please believe me when I say, I die and went to heaven. I was in love and still I'm.

There was nothing that would not do for her. Even on our early day of our relationship we could overcome any problems we would find ways to make each other happy.

Now here is were all started to fall apart. On about 2004 we have developed a cycle of brake ups and make ups. Every time we had a problem we would break up and of course we would make up, we would be Ok for a while and then something would happen and sure enough we would do it again and again. A non healthy relationship was growing. All that we have done was to sweep our problems under the rug and never really dealt with the issue at hand.

Now, March seventh two thousand and seven. I leave for out of town on the way to the airport we had a fight. We said stuff that we shouldn't have said, she called me back to say that she wanted me to have a safe flight and I reply by saying thank you for the call.

I get to my destination and called her to let her know that I have arrived safely, no answer, so I left a message at work, latter on the day I called back again and no answer. Two days go by and I finally on Friday I get a call from her. We spoke for about ten minutes and I said that I would call back, but I did not until I got back home on monday.

When I got back I called and she let me know that she was not very happy with me, so I answer her with Ok fine, by now a week has going by and I thought that I should call to see what's is going on between us.

As you can imagine the news that I was giving was that we are no longer together. I was devastated by the news. so i get into the saving the relationship mode once again.

So we go true a series of arguments and more fights, she assures me that she will never be with me again, that she loathes me, and so on and so fort

I had no choice but to wait for the situation to settle down.

However , I find out from her that she is already seen other people and that she likes what she is doing. She has told me about this other man that is relentlessly perusing her, she has told me where they been what they done.

I have been able to get her attention and By now she is beginning to accept some kind of communication with me. But she still try to avoid me at all cost except when I intersect her for a moment. Obviously I keep after her so that she will not forget that I'M still here and I want to resolve our differences. Not to bore you with my story .

Now we have gotten to the point were she has asked me for time to think about what she wants. I assured her that we can resolve our problems as long as we both want to. Whether or not she comes back I have made the decision to change for my own emotional health. I have conveyed this to her but her answer is that she as heard this before and she still time. She said that she has a good idea as to what to expect from us because she has lived with for four years with this volatile relationship. I would like to find the solution to our problem

I do not want to push her away but I find my self wanting her more and more each and every day and I feel that if i have a chance to get our relationship on the right track I might be loosing ground.

I need to figure out how to save my relationship if there is anything left to save or how do I deal with the fact that she is gone for good.

Please, some one give me some advice. please

Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 22,697
PDM Offline
True Blue Soulmate
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True Blue Soulmate
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 22,697
Hi Chicago1

I don't know how old you are, but I was thinking that, if you were very young when you got together, maybe it became too serious, too soon and your girlfriend has now realised this and feels that she needs to break free of the relationship. This can happen.

You talk about changes being necessary ~ you need to think about how serious these matters are.

Can you get relationship counselling? It might be a good ideas, as you have been together for a fairly long time.

Breaking up is never easy ~ I hope that you can sort it out and that you will both be happy.


"The secret of success is constancy to purpose" - Benjamin Disraeli.
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,925
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Best Friend
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,925
Communication is such a vital ingredient of a relationship. Never assume what the other thinks or wants. You need to sit down and calmy talk things over without raised voices.

If you find you can't talk without fighting, have you thought about writing it all up and giving it to her.

You need to sort out what each person wants from the relationship and what your long term goals are.

I agree with PDM, relationship counselling would be excellent here, friends mean well but they tend to favor one side.


Moderated by  Lisa Shea 

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