That's a difficult question. I got married when I was 21 and he was 22.
Not long ago, so indicator to my age!
However, I think I still have some insight.
We knew each other for 4 years before we go married. I met him shortly after my teenage first love of 4 years broke up with me.. so I was.. 17?
But without going into my own story which is irrelevant, I think one should date at least 3 years. Longer in most cases, but at the bare minimum, 3.
I've become so repulsed by church teachings that push for short dating, short engagement. Then I look at these couples and think... are they really in love? My cousin went through that. Short dating period, then got married suddenly and had a kid, all because of social, family, and church pressures. Now they are divorcing. She never loved him.
Another couple in my family dated for a year. No one even knew they were together until they told everyone they were getting married. Since he was/is the youth pastor, they didn't want it to cause drama. Now I look at them and think... really? They never touch each other (hold hands, arm around each other, something!) and hardly ever kiss (they waited until wedding to kiss). I can understand a couple's inhibition for PBAs... but when you're young and in love.. come on.
I'm crazy about my husband. Was when we got married, am now. And I just don't see that in people I see who don't wait to get married.
I think the reason is because they hit the wall that every couple hits, the wall of nit-picking. The wall where just everything bothers you and you want SPACE! We went through it, and it was hell. I can not imagine going through that while being "stuck together." It took 2 years for us to get past the romantic new car smell of the relationship and into the nitty-gritty. If you've only known each other for a year? Then you're going to go through that when married. And it's not fun. Then you get into resentment, and you can't get out because you're married.
