Well, well, Lady. I'm even more impressed. I'd say your hubby is a lucky man.
On the subject of spouses and their doing what we'd like for them to do, my first wife was petite (and I'm a fairly short guy at 5'6", but I have never had the small guy syndrome of wanting to "make up" for it and being pugnacious) and we got along fairly well, I'd say.
We had the "normal" division of labor - that is to say the house and the kitchen were hers! I'd help when I could, but I'd never feel like it was appreciated or even wanted.
I can understand and even approve of the sentiment of couples working at their relationships and marriages - working at the "nuts and bolts" of the relationship and the respect of each other's integrity and individuality and the active (as a verb) loving one another, besides being "in" love. But I have to also honestly add:
When the couple has the spark of sexual desire and communicates well, and discovers how to please each other, and doesn't let a "routine" to develop, it is very special.
And I think that the guy is much more apt to think of romance on the spur of the moment, and not just on the special occasions.
And by thinking of romance, I mean picking up a rose bud, or a boquet, or some chocolate, or jewelry - not as a "peace" offering or "guilt" penance, but to say he loves you. And by "he" (because I am a heterosexual male) I don't mean to exclude the other pronoun that could be used.
Also, for the sake of any guys who might be reading, romance is not shown just by buying gifts. Sitting down with your lover, looking at her, talking to her, holding her hand are things that can speak of romance. Offering to cook a special meal (even one dish will do), giving a foot rub, a back rub (even if you forget what the purpose was as you go along). The specific things are endless, but the unifyig theme is this: you have to actually pay attention to your partner and show your partner you like being with her/him.
Well, I'll get down off my soapbox, now.
What got me started was the thought that my first wife of 21 years never bragged about me, or even thought of me as good looking. Marge talks about me with her fellow nurses, and I know she appreciates me. A guy wants to be loved, sure, but he also wants to be admired or appreciated.
