I am married with 3 beautiful girls
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I have done the right things all my life, even if I didnt want to. I was young when I got pregnant and married. To a man who I thought to love. But over the years and more children, I have learned that I dont think I am in love or ever was in love with him. It was the catholic thing to do. Marry and have the child and deal with your responsiblities. Before I met my husband I dated this guy for a short while, who we were the greatest of friends, admired each other for who we were. We remained friends for about a year after we broke up.(and in the mist of him living in another state. thats why we broke up)
The last time I talked to him is when I first found out I was pregnant. He was upset and wanted me to live with him and raise the baby with him, but I didnt. And never called him back.
Threw the next five years I have looked every once and awhile for him on the internet. I found him about 2 years ago and I froze and didnt know what to say to him. Wondering if he would ever remember me. So I let it go, never contacted him. I have thought about him every day since the last time we talked. Wondering how he was, where he was, if he had his on family yet.
About 3 weeks ago I was on a internet to reunite people. I have had my page for about 7 months if that. When I went threw my emails and saw that he had found me, and that he never forgot about me. I opened the email and read it. My heart was in total shock. He told me that he has been looking for me since the last day we talked. And that he still loves me, and as much traveling he has done that he came back to the state we both lived in looking for me. His words " i came back to get the girl i left behind".
I wrote him back telling him that I was married with 3 beautiful girls. He was blown away and didnt know what to say. But eveuntually he wrote me back. Saying that he still loves me and he wants a second chance to make things right and that he knows what he has been missing and that was me all this time. He took a piece of my heart and I took a piece of his. But he wants me to leave my husband and he wants to be with me and my girls. I honestly dont think I can do that. But how do I tell him though. I dont want to loose him as a friend that I have missed, and thought about or almost 7 years.
You've been around long enough to know how bad divorce usually is.
That's what I see in your future if you reconnect with your friend. You both are still sharing feelings that apparently never disappeared long ago. You would be playing with fire if you started contacting or meeting each other.
That's my first reaction based on your saying that you've thought of him every day since you last talked.
However, perhaps I am overreacting. Maybe you should start a friendship with him with your eyes wide open. So long as you don't find yourself thinking of him more and more or have thoughts of being with him, you should be ok. Make it very clear to him that you are a faithful and loving wife and would not risk a divorce for anything. At the first sign of trouble you would need to drop your friendship with him.
Hope this helps! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com