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Love will not always linger longest - With those who hold it in too clenched a fist. -- Alice Duer Miller

I would love to go out to dinner with him

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
My boyfriend and I broke up in September. In that period, up until November, we were still talking to each other and having "relations." I kept telling him that I wanted to work on things, but he would not talk with me about things, as far as what we could do with each other to make things work out. He just kept avoiding the questions. He has since gotten into a relationship with someone else, and demanded that I stop all contact with him, which of course infuriated me. So as he instructed, I stopped talking with him. In the past week, though, he has called me every single day and I have not answered, until one day. He then asked why I had not answered his calls and I told him it was because he told me he wished to sever all contact. He then confessed that he wanted to go out to dinner with me and I still refused. Apparently he felt insulted and then proceeded to tell me the very next day what a delightful night he had with his new significant other the evening I refused his dinner invitation.
I would love to go out to dinner with him and would love to have him back, but I don't want to be his secondary source of entertainment when his new relationship is not having the desired effect for him. But Im not sure if I am being used in this situation or if he may want to try to actually speak with me. My friends tell me not to go to dinner with him, but a part of me really wanted to that night, and it took a lot for me to turn him down.

RomanceClass.com Advice
My advice is to be honest with him.

If you want to go out to dinner with then do it. If you want to talk to him then do it.

Otherwise you are sending mixed messages which is the worst way to have a fruitful relationship with someone.

You've been broken up since September and he has a new g/f, so the odds are against you. But you should take your best shot.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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