He needs to be a bit more trusting

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I cheated on my boyfriend six months ago. He caught me, but wanted me to stay, I said I would. I have not cheated again and have no intention of cheating, I have tried in every way I can think of to prove this to him, so much so that I have lost two good male friends. Almost every day he accuses me of cheating again, I am trying to hang in there but I feel that he wants me to cheat again so that he can be proven correct. Our history includes him telling me every detail of his days prior to me, he is a natorious womanizer, and during our first six months together he constantly warned me that he would be gone as soon as he found a replacement for me. I cheated because I figured that we would not last much longer, and for all I could see he was not really mine. After I cheated he has become so possessive, I have tried to tell him I am not an object, but a person who needs a life of my own, in addition to the one that we share, but if I even go out shopping alone I am given the third degree, and even physically checked for evidence of infidelity(I don't know what he expects to find), I put a stop to that after the first time, now when I won't allow him to feel me up for his cheating check he says that is suspicious, and I must be hiding something. I don't expect him to be able to trust me so soon, but I do think that he needs to be a bit more trusting or at least give me an explination as to why he thinks I am cheating so that I can defend my self, and show him the truth. I am losing faith in our abiity to make this work, and now am wondering if this relationship is worth the effort. I am feeling (rightly/wrongly) that I am a trophy he won me from another man, not a person he really cares about. When is enough enough, or am I being to rushed about expecting him to let the past lie. He said he forgave me but I'm not so sure.
(please edit as needed)




RomanceClass.com Advice
He is too possessive and is treating you like an object.

My advice is to give him the boot. He has drawn out this jealous behavior too long and doesn't seem to want to get over it.

You have given in to some of his outrageous demands and enough is enough.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com





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