My jealousy extends sometimes past his best friend though

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
well, i am a gay 17 year old male currently in my first serious relationship. my 20 year old boyfriend and i have been dating for 7 months now. We are in love, being able to tell each other everything and supporting each other greatly and we keep the love growing. i feel as if every aspect of our relationship gets stronger everyday except for a problem i tend to have: jealousy. unlike me, my boyfriend has had a lot of experience with dating, sex, and relationships, admitting not being able to even give an exact number. the thing is that my boyfriend's best friend used to be way more than a friend. they actually used to be boyfriends and then they were just friends with benefits and now they are best friends. i dont give a big fuss to my boyfriend for talking to this guy but i usually feel kinda hurt and paranoid when they talk or hang out without me. i know that my uneasy feelings could potentially ruin this relationship that i find so beautiful. my jealousy extends sometimes past his best friend though. sometimes i get very jealous when my boyfriend dances in some type of sexual way with other guys or when things between him and other guys get a little touchy such as sitting on laps, etc. so how do i control my jealousy? how can i confront my boyfriend that somethings he does with other guys makes me a little uncomfortable? should i even confront him about it? please give me your advice. i love him too much to let my jealousy start to get in between us. Advice
You are very wise to recognize that jealousy can ruin relationships.

What you can do is to fight against the jealousy as if it were an enemy. Whenever jealous feelings attack you, fight back by saying to them that he loves you and tell the feelings to go away and not bother you. After doing this a hundred times, the jealousy will give up and stop trying to bother you.

You can also do this more positively by boosting your trusting feelings. Whenever the bad feelings come say to them I trust my lover completely so get lost.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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