Bowling alley blues
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
Okay, last Friday night my ex bf and I were at the bowling alley with our friends. I got there before him and when he walked in he basically said hi to everyone but me. He had a very good friend of his in from out of town. I got upset and went for a long walk with a friend of mine and when I got back he was talking about me to his friend. I didn't like that and we ended up getting mad at each other. Any way, we talked a little later and his good friend "counseled" us. I know that I broke his heart very badly (unintentionally) and he broke mine as well. He came over and sat by me and put his arm around me and was blowing on my face and asked me for a kiss, I gave him a small one. Then I started to cry because I was confused. He was wiping my tears and calling me "baby" in the voice he always used with me and looking at me with love in his eyes like he always did before. I said I wanted to talk about things but he did not want to so I got upset. We did end up talking and he said that he did still love me but wanted to spend time with his friends. We ended up getting in an arguement and he then said that he didn't love my any more but I think it was just because he was mad. He told me, "remember when I said I would always love you? Well, I'm a man of my word". I believe that he does still love me very much but thinks we are bad for each other because of a few fights we had. I still love him and want him back but I am not going to beg. Then a few nights later I ran into him at the mall. I said "what's up" and all he said was "i'm eating". I asked who he was there with and he just said "my best friend". I then asked him for a hug (as a friend) and he just said, "not right now, i'm eating".
So I said bye and left. Do you think he still loves me and is just being stubborn and trying to act like a man around his friends? I will see him tonight probably at the bowling alley (we all go there every fri. night) and I am not sure how to act around him. I think he was trying to get back together with me last week but I thought that we should talk first so that we would not make the same mistakes that we did last time. I know that guys don't really like to talk about things like that, though.
You both seem to still love each other.
But you are both too argumentative and stubborn to make it work out. Somebody has to make a decision to put love before arguing. Ideally both of you would do it at the same time.
My advice is to continue to try to make things work since you once had a good thing. You don't have to beg him, just talk to him as a rational person and appeal to his good sense and the feelings he has for you.
If both of you are willing to listen to each other and refuse to fight then things should go well for you.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com