I made a possibly hasty decision in a moment of anger
Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
I guess I need to know if I've made the right decisions in asking my fiancee of 18 months to move out. We are as compatible as two people can be, we even finish each other's sentences---BUT he will not stand up for me and defend me when it comes to his ex-wife and two kids, ages 9 and 11. I have given him ample warnings that he needs to put his ex-wife in her place but he will not do it!! The kids call me mom and tell me they love me but when I try to discipline them and teach them respect, they run to their mom and tell her all kinds of fabrications which then causes their mother to get irrate. She then calls my fiancee on his cell phone and literally screams in his ear. She threatens him with never seeing the kids again (one of which we believe is NOT his, for whom he has payed child support on for 9 years now) and she has called me every name in the book and threatened to pull me out of the car by the hair and beat me up and he just stands there and listens to her rant and rave and won't stop her! (The last call lasted over an hour and he said about 4 words the entire time.) She dates bi-racially and lets her kids call her boyfriends "daddy" but hates the fact that they call me "mom". I think it all boils down to her being jealous --but do I stand back and tolerate her nonsense or do I make the decision to end our relationship forever because I can have no peace and happiness with him when she starts her rampages? He is already packing his things because I made a possible hasty decision in a moment of anger. Did I make the right decision???
You have done the right thing.
There is a good chance that his ex would physically assault you one of these days. She definitely sounds like a dangerous person.'
The only other thought that comes to mind is for the two of you to move someplace where the closeness of his ex won't be as much of a problem.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com