She's an 11/10 and he's 5/10

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
Ive known this girl since we were both kids, as we live in the same street and we both go to the same youth group where she is the youth leader. Were both 19. At the end of 2004 she partnered me to my school formal as a friend. Ever since the formal though, Ive grown to like her a lot, to the stage where Ive developed feelings for her. Since the formal I only ever see her once a week at the youth group. At the start of 2005 and nearly every other week I used to catch her staring at me. I could be talking to some people and shed be in another group in another conversation, and if I was to turn or look around the room I would immediately catch her staring dead straight into my eyes for no apparent reason. Once I caught her shed look a bit nervous, and look away. Some nights Ive caught her out and then she does it again two minutes later. One night I was sitting down talking with someone and she was in the row in front and I just happened to look in front and caught her again. This time I held the stare and I smiled, she did too, and then turned back around.

Whenever we both hold a conversation we are both very shy towards each other, as were both shy people, but she always looks me in the eye so much so that Im just too nervous to hold the contact.

If she is ever walking towards me in the street or mall she looks in my direction then quickly looks away and acts all nervous until we pass, when she does acknowledge me, sometimes acting surprised that she has seen me. Also whenever I make a mistake, be a clutz, make myself look stupid or tell a dumb joke, shell laugh. Im just too scared to make a move or anything because Im afraid of being rejected and making a fool of myself, plus shed be an 11/10 in the looks dept, whered Id only rate myself 5/10 which makes me wonder why shed be even remotely interested. Im sort of waiting around for her to give me more of these signs before I do anything, but in the meantime I know that she might just find someone else, maybe for good, then I would loose her for good. Advice
You better get those roots out of the ground and start moving!

She asked you to the formal last year. She looks at you all the time. She's nervous around you. All the signs point to the fact that she probably adores you. Not all girls are into looks. She probably feels that she isn't that attractive-- a lot of beautiful women feel that way.

So, get your rear in gear and ask her out. Buy her a holiday present. Let her know that you care for her. You can tell her that you are "developing feelings" for her. If you wait someone else will take her... especially since she is an 11/10.

Get over your shyness, be the brave one and go first. Soon you will be feeling very natural with her. If you don't start now, when will you?

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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Treat her like a friend

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