Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
me and my boyfriend have been together for about 8 months now, and we also live together..I have 100% trust in him and always have, infact i've never had so much trust in any one person ever in my whole life!! But the problem is.. He doesn't trust me at all!! I've never given him a reason not to trust me, i've never cheated or hid anything from him ever, I always speak the complete truth with him and have always been honest from the start! I told myself in the beginning I was gonna do this relationship right this time, he was so special to me and I wasn't about to mess that up for anything!! And it seems the more and the harder I try the more he can't seem to trust me!! He'll say he was just starting to trust me but NOW he can't cause he thinks im lying about something and "He just knows it!", but im not, and I wont be, and sometimes I feel so overwhelmed and flustered that I almost get lost and confused and I cant seem to come up with any logical answers! Like for example, he had thought i called his phone at 11:20p.m. and there was a message from some girl on the phone and you can't here it well except for call me,bye. at the very end, and it sounds like it could be me, but IM not even sure if it's me on there, i don't have on my phone that i called him at that time and his phone had been off!! so there's no clear evidence that it was me but he said it sounded like me, and of course the whole point was that he could hear other people in the background like i (or whoevever it was) was talking to someone! and at that time I was at home by myself, I hadn't used my phone, no one had come by or anything, infact my phone had been in my coat pocket in the other room!! now he just thnks im lying, when if you ask me DON'T KNOW WHY I WOULD LYE ABOUT SOMETHING DUMB like that?!?! i've even got to the point where i had confined myself to always staying home, never going out or spending time with friends just cause I knew he would be tripping out the whole time and wouldn't be able to trust me!! i even had gotten in a really down depressed stage and i've finally gotten myself out of it!! I know he loves me and infact i've never been treated or loved my someone the way he loves me!! he does have trust issues and doesn't really trust anyone, and i guess he could have insecurity issues.. There is also a difference in age.. i'm 19 and he's 28.. he's also been married and divorced (whom he had 2 kids with) and another child with another woman before that! so he's definitley been there done that, so i'm not ever sure if im handling things on the same level as him either, and the list just goes on from there.... so please if you have some advice or just anything PLEASE help me!!i'm desperate to know if we can work through this and make it work!!we have so much fire still between us, and i would be devastated without him!!

RomanceClass.com Advice
Show him this question which will be under "Why would I lie about something dumb like that"

That should tell him everything he needs to know about trusting you.

If he can't trust you then he needs professional counseling to help him get over his jealousy.

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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