My EX and I were together for 3 months

Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Male
My EX and I were together for 3 months..She did not date much for 4 years..She has a 8 year old and was never married..On the first date she told me she wanted kids marriage etc,I wanted the same...We connected instantly,we were everything we were looking for...Within a month I was moving in next year after my lease was up,and she was telling me she loved me...That was quick for me I never moved that fast,but I also was really in love too...For two months it was great,we never fought and got along so well...The sex was great,I did everything right according to her..there was no problems at all...She would always want me to come over...Now I am a very busy person,we would always seem to get together at least three time a week...Which was fine by her because she was busy too.Then after my activities were over she hit me with the bomb,and said she needed time too think and take a step back...She never gave me any reasons at all....She said everything was great in the relationship, just needed time...Well a week passed and I was shocked I never saw it coming,by how good we were,so I stayed away no contact at all....then she called and we talked for hours,so I thought we would be fine...We agreed to slow it down.The first week was good, you would never know it would happen again the following week....She said it was too much too handle and we need to stay away for awhile so we do not end up hating each other...I know she is used to being alone and independent,and I know the kid had something to do with it..But I really never got to bond with him either I was not around or he was not around..But the few chances I had we did talk it was not awkward..I know we would have been fine we just did not have enough time together.That is what the winter would have been for,before I moved in...I thought maybe there might have been someone else, for the sudden break up,but I have learned that it is not the case...We have not talked in almost 2 weeks... I e-mailed her once this week,and asked for some reasons for closure purposes,whether it hurt my feelings or not,and I have got nothing at all.....I left it up to her to e-mail if there was something,or not too, if you are telling me you are not sure,so we would not get into it on the phone....It was not a ugly break at all,I am just not sure what I should do...... Advice
It seems that too much happened too fast in three months.

Try calling her once a week just to see how she is doing, to let her know you still care for her, and to maintain contact. Be cheerful, don't discuss your relationship, and limit the call to 15 minutes.

She will appreciate the space and you will enjoy the contact. Gradually she may come back toward you.

Hope this happens! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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