I said fine if this will make her feel better
Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Male
I am recenly married, my wife worked full time at a local supermarket before we married. she said she has a freindship with one of the male department managers (HE'S MARRIED). that I feel is a little strange. before we married they would talk openly in private about thier sexual past partners in some detail. I know conversations will drift. but she told me after some time he started turning the conversation to her. he got a little more daring and started asking her if he could kiss her, take her to bed. She told me she would tell him he has no chance of doing any of those things, but he kept making attempts. I have a big problem with this, even though it was before we married. She told me when we started dating, she would not get into those type of conversations and she would not tolirate them if they came up. She no longer works at that particular store, but she still food shops there. I dont like the way this guy has crossed the line. granted, she has let him talk to her this way or he would have never tried to see what he could get away with. I completey trust my wife an know there is no threat. I told her I dont like her talking to him at all. she said she understands but feels badly about just treating him with a cold shoulder everytime she bumps into him. (she's at the store 4-5 times a week to pick up things) she wants to be able to at least say hello and chit chat and also wants me to act ok and suck it up when I am around him when we are at the store together. I think she is a little nieve thinking this guy has not talked to other people in the store about the things she told him confidence. I FEEL He disrespected her, even though she allowed it. she said he is her freind and cant believe he would spread any rumers. we have argued about this. all she wants is to have some minor conversations when in the store and thinks its rude to just stop talking to him after they were close friends, I said fine if this will make her feel better, she is a great person and treats everyone with respect. do you think this is healty? am I overreacting and jealous. it makes my stomach turn to know that he has spoken with my wife in that way and has asked her to do. She said she respects me and would never let anyone talk to her in that way ever again. she said she is a married woman now.
I agree that you are overreacting to the situation.
On the other hand, why doesn't your wife start shopping at a new store?
There must be a good reason or you would have suggested it.
You have been doing well handling the situation except for the jealousy which you have sometimes. You trust your wife and that should be the end of it. If she wants to have some minor chit-chat with him what's the harm?
Be thankful you are blessed with a good wife and marriage and if this is your worst problem then you are very well off.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com