I could be happy with either, but if I wait too long I'll lose them both
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I've E-mailed you guys in the past about an Ex I wanted back. Well half a year later, I have met this wonderful woman. She's a bit older than me, I'm 23 and she's 29. But we click really well.
The problem is, recently my ex who's 19 and currently living in England for a year, has been thinking about me and missing me a lot. She told me she loves me and she realized all the wrong she did to me. She's seen what's out there and wants me back.
This stirred up much emotion for me. I had wonderful memories with this girl, I loved her, and still love her very much. But I also love the new girl. I told both of them about the situation. So they know about eachother, and they know they both want me. I knew I had to come to a decision.. However, I realized, putting them through this dilema of choosing amongst them was not fair to either of them. So I offered to simply just be friends with both of them until I can figure things out with myself. They both agreed. The older gal, the one I met recently, was very understanding, and very helpful.
My ex has also been very patient with me as well, and very caring towards me. She feels a lot different, and I really do sense she's changed and grown up a bit.
So after all that background, my dilema is, I can't figure out who to choose. I've searched my heart for days and I am so torn between them. I love them both the same, I could be happy with either, but if I wait too long I'll lose them both. And if I rush it I may be faced with regret. I don't want to make a wrong choice or hurt them, they're both amazing women.
Do I just let them both go? They both want me very much and I want them! I just, I can't seem to make up my mind! Any advice would be a lot of help.
If you let them both go, who do you think you would miss the most?
Who would you like to be with 10 or 20 years from now?
The 29 year old may want children right away. Are you ok with this?
When does the girl in England get back? Does that matter to you?
Since you value them equally, is there a financial difference?
Does your family prefer one over the other?
Do their goals in life match yours?
Do you laugh more with one than the other?
Any religious issues?
Are they equally honest, open, caring, trusting, communicative?
These are things that come to my mind. Perhaps you have already considered these things.
Give yourself more time to figure out what you want. It's an important decision, obviously.
Good luck! George
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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