She said just let me get this partying and stuff out of my system

Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
This is an update I just want to know what you think about what I did. She took me out to dinner and things went great, it was almost as if we where back together. Well I dropped her off at her house and she said why don't come in and hang for a little bit, I accepted. When I was going to leave I hugged her and went to give her a kiss on the cheek and she pulled away. I asked what was that about she said I just don't know what you are going to do. So I asked if she would come out on her porch to talk to me. I said I don't know if we should be spending as much time together because it was sending me and her mixed signals. She said if that is what I want then thatís ok. She said I love spending time and being with you and if I can't handle that then thatís ok. I then had to let her know what my feelings where. She said I don't know what are future has in store for us, she said I don't want you to sit around and wait for me go and do what you half to do, life is to short to wait for things. I said bulls**t life is plenty long to what for the one you love. After saying this she started to cry and we hugged for a couple min. without saying anything. I said that I'm not just sitting around waiting, I told her my life is the best it has probably been in two years, I'm back in school, working out everyday, I've lost 51 pounds in 3 months, and got a second job to put me in a better financial status. Than I said there is just that one thing missing and that would be her. She than started to cry again. She said just let me get this partying and stuff out of my system and then I will know what to do. We than talked for about ten more min. about things and than I said listen people have been telling me since the day we broke up that you'll meet someone new and you could meet the girl you marry tomorrow. I told her that was wrong and I have already met the woman I want to marry and spend the rest of my life with. She than lost it and cried some more. I than said I was going to go and gave her a big hug (she held on like she didn't want to let me go) and I whispered in her ear that I will always be here for her and I love you, she responded back with the same. This was about 12 days ago and I saw her again tonight and she was acting a little weird and at first I wasnít sure why. She said she was going out for her birthday on Sat. and she wants me to go and invite some of my friends to come along to. When I was going to leave I said call me and let me know where you plan on going on Sat and I still owe her a birthday dinner. She responded with Oh I thought you didnít want to see me anymore. I said that was not what I meant by that, and she seamed pretty happy to hear that. Do you think things are still cool between us? Or did I go too far with the talk on the porch? Advice
Except for being separated everything sounds great for you two.

Sharing your feelings on the porch was a good thing and got some things out in the open that you both had been bottling up.

Take her at her word and let her get stuff out of her system. Maybe then she will come back. Meanwhile remain her best friend and be there to share feelings with and be a shoulder for her to lean on and an ear to confide in.

Here is a website of out tips on getting your ex back:

Good luck! George

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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