I'm shy with this guy
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
well ive been liking this guy for about 3 years now and ive really liked him...but im really shy and i dont even bother to talk to him because im scared...i dunno i feel like he is going to ignore me or sumthing..and its weird cuz all of my friends are like good friends with him and hes kewl with them except for me...again because im so shy and like its weird because im not used to talking to guys.
most of my life guys never talk to me..didnt really have much guy friends and well im barely getting the hang of it..and well i really cant talk to guys i like..its like a part of ma brain goes dead..and well i was just wondering what i could do to get rid of this phobia and finally start talking to this guy..i would really appreciate it...
The reason you have trouble talking to him is that you like him - so you really care about how he would react, where you don't care as much how your friends react. You put him into a different "group" than your friends. But you have to realize that the best way to be with someone that you like is to BE their friend. That is the most important thing you can possibly be to someone.
So don't think of him as a "potential date". That makes you all nervous. Think of him as a *friend*. He is someone you want to be able to talk with, to walk with, to spend time with. Friendship is key. And friendship involves talking. Nothing else can work until you guys can talk together.
Don't leap into it. Start just saying "hi" when you pass. Ask how things are going. Share your life. Ask about his. If you grow it gradually, it won't be scary, and it will get you two closer and closer together. You have to take that step and start, though. Only you can do that, and it's one of those things you have to take a deep breath and just do.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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