Kissing on the Second Date

Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Male
ok u said that the right time to kiss is after you feel comfortable with her hugging u and stuff right well im totally comftorble with it but iv only seen her 1 time do u think the next time i see her if i try to kiss her it will be too soon? Advice
It all comes down to how comfortable you both feel. If one of you is ready and the other isn't, it's not going to work. I think that one date is a bit quick for any serious kissing, because being comfortable with another person near you usually takes more than one date. Usually the first date is about getting to know each other, and being comfortable near each other. You might do a quick kiss at the end because you're "supposed to", but you miss the whole point if you do!

You're rarely at the stage where you can just snuggle into each other contentedly and hold each other all night after just the first date! That usually takes a few dates to build up that trust and comfort level. If you put out your arm does she automatically go into that nook and hold you close? That's comfort :) And it's in THAT environment that a kiss is really powerful.

Don't rush it. There's no rush. A relationship is all about the small things. Even people who go "all the way" love to hold hands, to touch, to snuggle. Those are the real keys to a relationship. So savor those things. Really enjoy the first snuggles, the first kiss on the neck as you lay against her, the kiss on the inside of the wrist as you say goodbye. In many ways those 'tender moments' are far more intimate than that full mouth kiss will ever be. You'll get to the kiss soon enough, when it's something you're both ready for!

-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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