we are attracted to each other and have the same moral principles
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I am 21 years old and I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. Alot of it has been long distance, but currently we are in the same place and I am not sure if i should move on and stay togather. The thing is we seem to fight a lot and it is partly because he never wants to make plans in advance he is like the ok wanna hang out now, lets go person and I am a planning person. Also, I dont feel like he does romantic stuff or surprises. It is like our relationships is hanginig around all the time. I have been back to scool for 1 month, we havent gone out for once for dinner. When i mentioned it, he was like it just hasnt worked out. and i feel like if you care about me so much it should work out. Also, I feel as though he likes to keep me seperate from the rest of his life and that really bugs me. Like, i met his parents and family and ocassionally talk to them. However, his old friends, he never wants to me to hang out with him and his friends. It likes if we spend time togather its me and him and if he spends time with his friends/ family it him and them all the time. I also get the feeling even though he says he cares about me that he doesnt largely because i feel isolated from other parts of his life and when i talk to him about this, he just says my friends dont want to hang out with both of us its not fun. I just dont know. I want a guy that is there for me and that i am a part of his life in everyway and that likes to do surprises and romantic stuff and he is just not that. The reason i feel like we have been togather so long is the chemistry- we are attracted to each other and have the same moral principles and stuff, but we are different personalities. I just dont know if this is normal... I am not sure our relationship is normal... should i move on? or what should i do? and its so hard bc we have been togather so long that i wouldnt even know how to do it... please advise.. thanks
It sounds like you have thought about this a lot and have tried to remedy the problem many times on your own.
My advice is to move on. It doesn't seem like he is going to change something that is so much a part of him. It doesn't sound like he cares for you very much.
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com