Its like I have this anger inside mostly from the past
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
Hi. My fiance and I have been together on and off for 2 yrs and together for one full year almost. In the beginning when we first started dating he cheated on me but he said it was only because he thought I was cheating on him when I never did. Well I left for 6 months and then came back. We ended up getting back together and everything was great but I get in these moods where I am mean to him and get attitudes and we argue about little things and we have a 6 month old son and I dont want our son to be exposed to the arguing. And I want this to really work between us. I dont know if I or we should go to counseling. Its like I have this anger inside mostly from the past and my childhood-My father argued with my mom my whole life. I dont know what to do. I love my son and fiance soo much and I want to change and he is on the verge of leaving me. I am soo scared he is going to leave me. What can I do? Please help!
Going for counselling is a good idea and you are a good candidate... go with him if you think that is necessary. Probably is.
It's tough breaking out of patterns you've learned from your parents. It's like if you're not arguing something is missing.
He is most likely the first one to notice when you get into that mood. Ask him to give you a physical sign when it happens. It could be the Spock finger trick, or making a triangle with your thumbs and forefingers.
Your part of the bargain is that you will *pleasantly* drop the subject and say "well maybe we should talk about this later." Hopefully on a lot of these never will never come.
Remember you have to pleasantly drop the subject. Give him a hug to show him you love him.
Hopefully this will work!
p.s. if you have trouble with PMS, warn your bf that it is about to start so he is aware you may be a little more edgy than usual.
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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Loss of trust