will she get through this party phase and want to come back to me?
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
I first met my gf while she was dating another guy for 4 years that treated her badly. We started talking for about 2 months before she broke it off because she went back to him, I was always a great guy to her and she knew that. I was away for 3 years and never kept in contact with her, but did with her best friend. Well, when I came back into town, her best friend told me to met up with her and I did. From then on, we became best friends and started dating. We got real serious real fast and started planning our future together. We went on vacations and met each others parents and everyone loved me on her side. She was very happy to have me in her life and wanted me there forever. We were dating for six months before she ended it because she said she wasn't ready to settle down and she said not until she graduates college which is in 1 year. I noticed that she was fighting to hold on until the last days of the break up. She said she just want to go out and be with her friends and wasn't looking to date anyone else right now. She is very independent and she can handle being on her own. She always wanted to go out and party and so do I, but with her by my side. When she went out with her friends, she loved the attention guys were giving her and this was when I wasn't around. She's 21 and I'm 24 and she has always been with someone and I have not. We were very honest to each other and she wanted the relationship to get serious before I did, I just went with it and then I became serious when I knew she was. She has also told me that she has neglected her friends in the past due to her emotionaly bad 4 year relationship and she didn't want to do that with me. I was always great to her and never did anything bad, everbody on her side thought that we were going to last forever, so did I. Sometimes when we fought, which was only when we went out and drank, she became very defensive and would shoot me down if I wanted to talk about what happend. I think this is due to her past bf which treaded her badly and she still carries that with her. There was about a one year gap after she ended it with him and got together with me. I was very understanding when she wanted to end it and we have talked twice in the past month, it's been about a month after it ended. She sounds very excited to talk with me and she talks about how she still thinks about me, she called me after a month of no contact. She doesn't want me to be a stranger in her life and she wants to be friends and talk whenever, but I don't want to be so accessable to her. She once told me that I wasn't controlling of her, but I was controlling of our relationship. She was told me that she can see herself with me forever and I think the same towards her. I know and everyone including her knows that we're meant for each other. Do you think she will get through this party phase and want to come back to me? What should I do to get her to want me in her life again? Thanks
You are doing the best thing right now to get her back.
You are there as a good friend with a strong shoulder to lean on and someone to share her feelings with.
From how she describes her feelings towards you, I think it is only a matter of time before she comes back to the security of a relationship.
For your sake, I hope so!
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com