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Break a vase, and the love that reassembles the fragments is stronger than that love which took its symmetry for granted when it was whole. -- Derek Walcott

Prom was the most wonderful night I have ever had

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
hi, i'm sorry to bother you, but I am soo confused. "John" and I have been at school together for a few years and had not really met each other until we were both accepted into a state band and choir festival, where beings we represented our schools we got to know each other quite well. By the time the trip was over, we were really close. John and I went to prom together as "just friends", however, he told me before prom that he had a crush on me. I told him that I wasn't sure if I was just confused about my feelings, and that after prom I would tell him how I felt then. Prom was the most wonderful night I have ever had, and after school ended I went to his birthday. It was significant because he was turning 16, and his family (he is mormon) told him that he could start dating at 16. After his birthday, I tried to write him e-mails, and he never got back to me. The school year has just started again and this past week, he would smile when he saw my friends and I laughing, and he would kind of "admire from afar." I finally called him and he said that he's not mad at me, but that he doesn't fit in with my group (he's a junior, I am a senior), so I asked him to have lunch with me, and we did, and we had a lot of fun, but then back at school, it just went weird again for the rest of the afternoon. Now it's the weekend, and i'm so frustrated, because I know that he still likes me, I just don't know what's bothering him at the moment. My mother thinks that it might have to do with his religion somewhat, because she said that he might think that if he has a girlfriend, then it needs to be leaning more serious and longterm, or the fact that I am going off to college after this year. I think that it might be because I never did sit down and talk to him about how I felt about him after prom! I'm so confused!


RomanceClass.com Advice
Have a long honest talk with him.

Ask him the questions you raised here. Fist discuss his feeling that he wouldn't fit it as a junior. Make sure he knows that plenty of sophomores, juniors, and seniors mix together (yes, and sometimes freshmen)

Discuss his religion and see if that is a problem.

Maybe at the prom he felt out of place since you socialized with seniors there. If you go to another dance, be sure to include juniors in your conversations.

Best of luck!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com

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