he (once again) said he cannot be in a relationship with me
Visitor's Question from a 41-50 year old Female
My first serious relationship since the end of my
marriage (it's been four years) just ended last nite
and I am disraught. In this new romance, we were
together for eight months without a harsh word nor
argument. it was truly effortless as both a friendship
Two months ago, my beau's sister came to visit, he
freaked out that "being in a relationship equals loss
of self" and broke up with me, explaining that he
cannot be relationship at this time, and not be in a
romantic one with me. Within two weeks, we were back
together as we had both missed our special bond.
Last week we went back east to meet his family, who he
said liked me and I got along great with. The
vacation itself was fun, sexy and without any
incidents nor arguments. overall simply wonderful.
Within 24 hours of our return, however, he (once
again) said he cannot be in a relationship with me,
romance is out of the question, his feelings had
changed from when we first met (my feeling? that's
called evolving), it is really over and he's sorry. On
one hand I am shocked, on the other just numb and
cannot articulate my sense of loss at this action, esp
after such a great vacation together.
I am hoping you can help me thru this horrible event.
After my divorce, I never thought I could trust again,
and now that I have, I am questioning if I ever can.
Thank you for your help
To get thru this horrible event, you should talk with your best friend or seek professional counseling.
I can only give you limited support in a short impersonal email.
Be prepared for this guy to come running back again as he did last time. You will need to have a plan for what you will say.
There seems to be something about his family that makes him go awry. Both of these cases came right after visiting relatives.
You are too young to give up on trusting. You've only known this man for eight months and that is too short a time to develop a full relationship.
Sorry you are in this situation!
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com