i guess i am just angry at the fact that he can only call me when its about work or if he wants sex
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
George, you gave me teh advice to stop playing games with my boyfriend and that should make things better. you're rigth, playing games with him isnt going to get us anywhere. but this was before i read your message. i have told you that we work together. he is a loan officer and he on vacation right now. i have always helped him get his loans closed cuz thats the way that he makes hismoney (commission only) so i understand its stressful when he doesnt make any money or very little money one month. well today, i kept on ignoring his phone calls and his emails. i guess i am just angry at the fact that he can only call me when its about work or if he wants sex. not otherwise and it wasnt like that before. when we first started dating everything was going great, he was always calling me just for the hell of it sometimes. we used to be on the phone for hours. finally today i started replying to his emails but it was later in the day. i did call him as well and he sounded very angry with me. finally after i got off work a few hrs later he called and i did answer. he started being really smart with. he was like i am not sure why you arent answering my calls and its really unprofessional of you. if you cant take this anymore then possibly we hsould discuss a different startegy, like finding another processor for my loans. and he kept on repeating that. i apologized to him but he didnt want to listen. he said that i just need to grow up and that he is sick of hearing my apologies. i am really scared now that because of this, he might stop working with me and may even want to stop dating me. what should i do??
It all begins with honesty.
Like you were very honest with me and calm too.
Be the same with this guy. Tell him your were playing games and regret it very much. Tell him the reason why you were doing it (in a gentle and loving way).
Follow my advice from before and try to get things turned around. Something went wrong from when you started dating until now. Work with him to try to figure out how. Don't argue with him, try to listen and agree when you can. When you don't agree, say "I hear what you are saying."
Maybe you could do some of this over a nice elegant dinner out followed by a visit to one or the other's home for further conversation. He will start to mellow out after wining and dining and then in anticipation of other joys.
Just make sure you get a good long talk out of this. But don't try to stretch it too far into the evening.
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com