She has a sexual relationship with him, and well with me

Visitor's Question from a 31-40 year old Female
My girlfriend who is 29, I'm 34,of almost 3yrs just broke up with me on May 31,2005 due to me not supposedly being more affectionate/emtional with her. After the devestating blow, I also found out that she was seeing and emailing a 17yr old , and fooling around with him, which I am a female. There relationship was developing in April 2005, and I knew nothing, just thought they were friends. Anyhow I went through a very tough two months being it is now end of July 2005. We are still friends, but I want her back, and well she isn't sure what she wants cause she loves us both, but I think she likes him more for the emotional side, and I'm there for the support and provider side. She gives me mixed signals since she spends time with both of us, but I know he is her main priority. I just don't know what to do, and we have trip to Disney with her two kids that was planned before this split, which I paid for, and a few concerts which she wants to go with me still. But sometimes I feel I'm being used, and my family says to give her space and take a step back and make her come to me, but I'm afraid if I give her space she says she may move on. I love her soooo much, and I have realized not to take her for granted and give her the emotional stability she needs, but how long can/should I wait till this relationship with the 17yr old ends, if it will. She has a sexual relationship with him, and well with me, she wants just friends. But some days she does seem to want me back cause we cuddle or hold hands, and hug, sometimes kissing too. What makes it worse is she works at the same business I do, and I'm her Manager/boss. So I see and talk to her all the time, so it is hard to move on, even if I could. How or what should I do, to get back to her comming around to me again? Thanks Advice
Sounds like you should let her have her space and she will tire of the 17 year old.

After all, both of you are mature and that's going to work to your advantage. Make sure you fulfill the plans you have made and have a good time. Don't be pouty or negative.

You have a lot working in your favor, just give it time and my guess is that things will work out.

Good luck!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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