Nearly a month has passed since the incident and, i have more or less forgiven her.

Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
Me and my girlfriend have been dating since december, via a Long Distance relationship. She is in USA, and im from England.

Recently, my girlfriend wanted to please me by sending me a "strip tease dance video" in an Email. She did that... and it was great! me and her were doing perfectly prior to this Too.

The next day, to my suprise.... she has sent me another email, and i expected it to be another video. Which is was. BUT in the email header, it was also sent to another guy! both my email and his email were in the address bar.

She attached THIS message.

"Hope You Enjoy This Video....Why Did I Do It? In Case You're Feeling Freaky Again, You Can Look At This. XD! I'm More Than Happy To Talk "Dirty" Anytime You Want. XD! Oh, and I know I can trust you, but I can't stress enough.... PLEASE DON'T LET ANYONE SEE THIS! This is our little secret between me and you!"

She had accidently left my email address in the bar, (so she explained) we had argued and, i practiclly left her after i found out. I was SO angry.

She would keep apolagising for days, until i decided to actually listen to her, she told me that "i have no reason to why i did it - i didnt see any harm"

NOTE: this guy is actually a friend of hers online, in usa he lives in another state, so he is just an ONLINE friend nothing else. he is in iraq on a mission, usa army soldier. And they were talking online when he asked her to do it. (which she refused at first, but then later that night decided to send him the video that was suppose to be FOR ME)

The video consisted of her, taking her top off and dancing sexually to a song. No other nudity. But the point was... WHY DO IT TO SOMEONE ELSE?

Nearly a month has passed since the incident and, i have more or less forgiven her. BUT, I always get ticked off at her... for any small thing, i feel like, maybe she could do it again, and i wasnt too happy with her answer to why she did it anyway.. "i dont know"

So what can i do? I love her so much, and i thought everything was fine, i didnt see why she did it? she tells me she loves me too and she wants nothing but me... but i find it a little hard to trust.

What can i do? Advice
I don't blame you for being angry and jealous... I would be too.

It's good that you were able to forgive here even though you still don't undertsatnd why she did it. It probably falls into the category of a temporary brain malfunction... something we all have suffered. She probably felt sorry for the guy in Iraq. Not a very good excuse but something.

The reason you get angry with her over small things is that you are still angry at her for sending that video to someone else. It will take you some time to fully forgive her, but that time will come.

You have no choice but to trust her and she may disappoint you again in some way but don't let that standing the way of enjoying your relationship. Life is not always what we want it to be but it's all we have.

Good luck!

-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at

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