Summer of Love and Loss
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
I must say I have surrounded myself with the best cast of friends you could ask for. I just hope it stays entact like it has, life is great...atleast for me. This Summer of 2005 has been named as the "Summer of Love and Loss" and in my case sometimes together such as a "Love Loss". The Problems started shortly after my Junior/Senior Prom when I made that hard decision between "Girl #1" and "Girl #2". For two months I went after "Girl #1" because out of the two that I liked she was the more appealing person because at the time I just thought "Girl #2" was a close friend and I didn't know what kind of feelings I had for her. I have known "Girl #1" since my freshman year and she is a good person and a good friend. But I have known "Girl #2" much longer as a matter of fact for almost 6 years, every since our first class together in Junior High we hit it off and had instant friends. We carried out friendship all throughout our highschool years and go into our Senior year knowing that we are eachothers Best Friend. After coming to the conclusion that "Girl #2" was just a friend it was too late when I realized "Girl #2" was the really the only Girl for me and should have been my #1 Priority to begin with. "Girl #2" is my absolute undisputed best friend...and I would do anything for her. But it was too late..."Girl #2" was introduced to "Big Mistake #1". With her now beginning to talk to "Big Mistake #1" and becoming more than friends it pretty much took all my chances away. I told her she was my best friend and that I loved her so much that I would be happy if it made her happy even if she wasn't with me. But I really can't say that because it's a lie, sometimes you know things that are just right. But you can't beg anyone to love ya. Therefore "Girl #2" begins to date "Big Mistake #1" which makes "Big Mistake #2"...when I first found out she was talking to him I wasn't angry but I was most definately jealous. I know what's right and that's Robb & "Robb's Best Friend". I'm not finished yet and I'm not giving up...if you've ever heard the song "Unanswered Prayers" by Garth Brooks you'll know why because that song is keeping me going, thinking that with "Unanswered Prayer #1" maybe "Prayer #2" will be answered and I'll finally be with the one I love so much. With that said...what should I do, should I try to talk her out of the relationship that she is trapped in right now...or should I sit back and let the mistake go on longer. I'm afraid that the person she is dating is in the relationship for the wrong reasons, and I don't support it. I need help.
As your best friend she needs honest advice from you.
Even though you have your own self-interests to look out for, that doesn't mean you can't give her an open opinion of her relationship with the "mistake."
To be completely honest, you should tell her about your feelings for her so that she understands that your motivation may not be entirely unbiased. And, also so that she knows where you stand if she breaks up with the other guy.
So my advice is to open your heart to her and hope for the best.
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com