she started lying about where she was
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
im a 17 yr old in highschool, and i was dating this girl for almost 2 1/2 yrs. i've been to therapy and shrinks, but when im talking to them it feels like im being to what im thinking rather than what im actually meaning. i knew her for almost a yr before we started dating, and when it finally came around to me asking her, it wasn't a big thing at all- i already felt like we were going out anyway. after about 6 months, i said i loved her- to some random person reading this it sounds like nothing- but to people who know me (im the kind of guy who stutters at the word, and doesn't even say it to his parents), to people who know me- it means alot. When it came to her, i felt powerless, and like nothing mattered- i could be myself without caring what i looked like, or sounded or even acted. She was exactly the same. At around the seven month period, there started being rumors going round the highschool that she was cheating on me, around my school- if one person find something intresting to talk about, the whole school will know by the end of the day. i dismissed the rumors, and never bought it up with her. then it started named someone (apparently my bestfriend). I still ignored it. Eventually she stopped hanging out with me, alone and with friends....
she started lying about where she was- no im not a stalker or anything-- example. she would say she's at the mall- her car is in her driveway (and so is my bestfriends). so that time i walked over to her house, and he opened the door without his shirt on. i walked into school the next day and i swear to god, walking down the hallway, everyone stopped talking, looked at me, and as soon as i turned around, everyone went on talking to everyone else- i mean, i feel like im in some horrible teenager movie about highschool life at this point.
next day she broke up with me at her bestfriends 18th birthday party. it wrecked me, 2 1/2 yrs of an 18 yr old's life- its like devoting everything you've ever loved to one huge related cause and having set on fire and burn right infront of you.
next day i found out that she had been cheating on me with mybest friend, since the 7th month that we had been going out. i went to school, haden't slept at all, and felt completly wrecked- i saw him in the cafeteria, and i hit him. he went flying 10 feet backwards- again, anyone who knows me realizes that thats weird- i've never hit someone because of someone else. everyone in the room just stood there, watched and didn't say a thing. the principal was there, and he just watched, he almost expected me to hit him again. Next day i was called into the office, and told that if i got into another fight with him, i'd be suspended. next event are really alot to name, so i'll just do the short version
two days later i got sent to the principals office because he filed a report with thee cops. someone keyed his car, and he labeled me for being a suspect.
this principal knewabout the whole situation btw before i even stepped in there so he gave me his "famous pep-talk"- its really weird knowing that the whole 1400 students know about your personal life.
three days later i started getting threatening notes in my locker so i cleared my locker out...
next day or maybe 2nd next day...my ex and old friend decided that they could never be my friends again so they started convincing my friends to ignore me from now on....
unfortunatly, most of my friends realized that it would be eaiser to loose one friend (me), than 2 (them)
next 4 days or something my ex and my old best friend were caught having sex in the school auditauditorium lots of gossip going round school about that one...
it's been four months since she broke up with me now...
i cant look at her anymore. i cant walk down the hallway STILL without getting weird looks from people. im moving schools, to a differnt state because of this whole thing... but i guess what im asking is, should i be running away from all of this, or should i stay and adapt? am i ever going to get over her, or am i still going to feel like im going to pass out everytime i see her?
please dont give me the "it's not my place to say, only you can answer that" response- i've paid 2 therapists $630 to tell me that. tell me what you think.
the friend who's actually helping me write this thinks that it's necessary to mention that im 17 1/2, have attempted suicide twice, once through drug overdose and once through razor blades. Im sorry this is so long, but if i were to tell you all this in person, it would be alot longer. please write back
If you haven't reported your suicide attempts then that is the first thing you should do. Call 1-800-SUICIDE.
Assuming you have already reported your attempts (presumably to your therapists) here is my advice: do what you plan to do and go to a different state. You are in no condition to stay and deal with your high school. There are bad people in the world and you came across two of them (your ex and your ex best friend). Sorry you are in this situation.
Hopefully, you will find peace and joy in your new high school.
I hope so!
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com