We broke up but I still need closure
Visitor's Question from a 13-15 year old Female
My ex and I started dating when we were only 15 and we dated for 2 years. We were open and we were like best friends. He was my first love and I broke up with him once before and he asked me back out.
Things we were fine untill i had to move to arizona and he said he wanted a long distance relationship. We were constantly arguing, but i was able to come back home for the summer. I thought that things were going to be the same and they weren't. Our communication changed and we were just different.
Any ways to make a long story short I broke it off and then wanted him back but he said no. Sadly we ended the relationship on no closure and a lot thoughts. I have not talked to him in 4 months, but i want to get closure and move on. How can i finally move on and put this behind me for good ?
It definitely is key to find closure when you end a relationship, otherwise it can linger in your mind and nag you for months if not years. You guys were good friends before, you simply grew apart as you grew up. This happens all the time and really isn't anybody's fault. It's one of those things life does while you're growing up.
So give him a call and say hi. Just about every human being likes to think they are memorable and important - I imagine he'll be flattered to think you're still caring enough for him that you would call him. He may be a bit quiet if he thinks you're going to try to demand him back, so make sure he knows up front that you're just calling him as a friend. That should relax him. Then just say that you miss the friendship you had before, and you wish things didn't end the way they did. You might not end up being as close as you were before, but I imagine you two can at least talk together about things a bit and get that closure you're looking for.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com