he met me so soon after the broke up with the love of his life
Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Female
He's been under a lot of stress recently and had a breakdown at work last friday. Things were fine between us when we were at his cousin's gig the same night he had the breakdown, but as soon as we got outside he said that he wanted to stop seeing me because our situation was adding to his stress. He said that he never really thought we'd last this long and that he thinks I feel more for him than he does for me and that he doesn't want to fall in love with me. But I know he has feelings for me becuse he does tell me he loves me, but only when he's had a few drinks. He's even asked me to go away with him for the summer (while sober).
He says he needs time to get his head sorted, which I'm more than willing to give him. I'm just hoping I can get him back when he feels better. I know I'm not in love with him, I just have really strong feelings and I'm sure he has felings for me, otherwise we wouldn't have been going out for 8 months. He'd never fully admit that we were in a relationship, but he'd refer to me as his girl (and other terms). I think that he's afraid to have feelings for me because he met me so soon after the broke up with the love of his life. I know it seems bleak, but do you think there is any chance we can start seeing each-other again? I don't want a full on relationship, but I want us to spend time together, but as more than friends. This is the second time we've broken up because he says he doesn't want a relationship. I also know I have to prove to him that I can give him space, as I've been a little suffocating recently, (though, that's not because I'm that type of person. I'm having problems with my friends and have been substitutiing his friends for mine.)
Sorry this is a long letter, but this is really complicated.
All you can do is give him his space.
But, be standing nearby as his friend to help him if he needs it. You might also want to explain to him how you feel about him. He may be confused and think that you love him all out when you don't. That would take some stress off of him.
Friendship is what he needs now!
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com