Her reasoning for the break up was her confusion about what she wanted out of life
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Male
Hi there! I'm not sure if you remember me, I've come across some new developments in my situation, but I'll recap things just in case.
Three weeks ago my girlfriend of one year broke up with me. She's 19 and I'm 22. Her reasoning for the break up was that she had been feeling confused about what she wanted out of life. She wanted to be on her own for awhile and experience what was out there. She also said she might want to date other guys during this time. We have been very close and even at one point in the relationship she told me she felt that I was the one, I completed her and she was so in love and wanted to always be with me.
After a while that of course changed, she would pick fights with me over the silliest of things. She began to become depressed with herself, not knowing what she wanted out of life.
So recently I've been giving her space, she still wants to remain friends with me, and still talks to me. The other day she started showing signs of missing me. Wondering if I was seeing other girls, telling me she wants to hang out more, even wants me to visit her while she's living in England for a year working as an Au pair (nanny).
The other day I agreed to go see a movie with her. She was very happy to see me, we went out. During the movie she would sit very close to me, touch me slightly with her feet or her hands, and would lean in extremely close when she wanted to tell me something. I wanted to just kiss her so badly but I resisted.
After the movie we walked around for a bit and she pulled me by the arm literally into a Bath and Body Works shop where she had me help her pick out a few things. On the drive back she told me she had been having so much fun with me, and that in our recent dates in our relationship she would feel so tense due to the fighting.
We picked up her younger brother and hung out for a bit, grabbed dinner and rented a movie. Again while watching the movie she would touch me slightly. After that we all sat and talked, and since it was getting late I said I should probably be on my way. Right when I said that she jumped up and said she needed to get something out of her car. An excuse to walk outside with me?
We stood on her driveway and didn't know what to say really. I thanked her and told her I had fun, she did the same and we both hugged and I went on my way.
So my question is, what's going on in this girls mind? Is she merely just missing me and feeling lonely? Or perhaps is there a chance she's regretting what she did and is wanting me back? What should I be doing in this situation? I love this girl so much, you have no idea how hard it was for me to act strong and resist the temptation to just pull her close and kiss her. Hopefully you'll be able to answer my questions, and sorry this is quite lengthy. I look forward to hearing back from you.
The key to the mysteries may be found by simply asking her.
Tell her just what you told me. She knows what she is doing and it isn't clear to you yet. So just ask. Tell her how you wanted to reach out and kiss her and how she feels about that.
Do all this with some finesse since you don't want to scare her back into the other place she also wants to be (alone).
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com