This is destroying my relationship, please help.Visitor's Question from a 16-20 year old Male
Dear romance class,
My girlfriend and I have been together for just over a year. At one stage we were living together and things were going well for quite a long time. The majority of my girlfriends’ friends are male and I have had a lot of trouble dealing with that, as quite a few of them are also ex-boyfriends. I'm an extremely jealous person and when I see her with them in social situation we usually end up fighting before the night is over. I would say things like 'they are only playing the friend angle to get close to you because they want to get back with you'.
I don't know how to stop these irrational feelings of jealousy. I'm quite sure I could trust her to not cheat on me however the small part of me that doubt it makes me crazy when she is out with these male friends, even more than normal when I am not there with her.
What should I do? Is it reasonable to feel this way? Should I seek help from a professional?
This is destroying my relationship, please help.
Thanking you in advance,
Jealousy is a nasty habit which can ruin a good relationship.
The way to fight jealousy is to attack it. Whenever a jealous thought or feeling arises you have to tell it bluntly "Go away, my girlfriend loves me and would never cheat on me."
After about 1000 times, the jealousy will give up on you because it knows that it won't work with you.
If this doesn't work, then you probably don't trust her.
If you have the funds and interested you should see a professional counselor... that can only help.
We have tips on jealousy at: http://www.romanceclass.com/miscr/LoveCat/23682
-- from George
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com
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