I Want to Date my Ex
Visitor's Question from a 21-30 year old Female
I dated this guy about two years ago and I'm still in love with him. He and I are best friends and we hang out a lot together. Ever since we broke up I've still been in love with him.
Last year he dated one of my best friends and I was totally jealous. I wanted him back so bad. When they broke up they decided they really hated each other out of the middle of nowhere. Now I really want to go with him but he doesn't like me as anything more than a friend. Also if I do go out with him I'm afraid of what my friend (his ex) will say.
This year my best friend got hooked-up with this guy she'd been wanting to go out with all year. She had a lot of people ask her out but she said no to all of them because she was waiting to see if she ever had a chance with this one guy. I'm starting to wonder if I should do the same thing. Can you please help me? Thanks.
It's really common for friends to date friends and then date friends' exs. You are friends with people because you have common interests, so someone that likes one of you will probably like the others too.
Yes, she and he had a falling out. But that doesn't mean that you shouldn't date him. She's moved on to other people, he's moved on. If they just instantly hated each other it sounds more like hurt feelings during the breakup. That's one of those things you have to learn to deal with and get on with your life about.
All great relationship start with great friendships. Maybe your ex has been burned too many times and is hesitant to risk your friendship to be burned again. So go at it slowly. Show him how much fun you two have together, and then keep slowly upping the ante.
-- from Jenn
One of Your Friendly Advisors at RomanceClass.com